Happiness - It's taken for granted all too often

 It’s one of those things isn’t it? I know that I am very fortunate (and maybe a LITTLE bit lucky) to be able to live the life I do.  I feel the need to explain the difference. Fortune is something that an individual can directly influence e.g. being able to find traction to stay in the Philippines because I (hope) I have earned it whereas luck is this abstract, some might say karmic, invisible force that randomly affects people along the way.

'Conquering' Sarawak, Borneo

Over the last 12/13 months I have adventured in the jungles, discovered the underwater worlds of the Philippines and spent time in my be-loved London. I think that you guys have enjoyed reading my writings as much as I have enjoyed producing them. I feel quite privileged that I have the stories to tell and the people to listen to them and for that, I thank you. Yes. YOU.

Spreading my 'good word' through
the Philippines

I appreciate I have been a tiny bit absent of late. I am not altogether sure as to why that has been the case either so I have decided that I will not be as arbitrary with my communications. I write as I sit here waiting to board a flight from Terminal 3 at NAIA Manila to Dumaguete – a place I call my home away from home... Duma-G not the airport. Why am I so excited? Well. If you were to ask me to say the first things that pop into my head it would go something along the lines of:

Seeing Tim and Zoe

Massive bro-hug with Jim

Soly and Kai’s big smiley faces

ALL of the staff. Can’t wait for a barrage of people calling my Byran (Adams), bum patting from the 

boat crew, trying to learn Visayan with the house keeping ladies, banter with the kitchen crew... oh gosh. EVERYONE

Getting into the water (and playing with my new gear)

Diving. Full stop.

The Sun. The Sea. The Sky. Capital S’s intentional

My family. Those who helped me
create MY balance and give me the support and 

I don’t know why but my heart skips a beat at the thought. My theory or life philosophy if you want me to be pretentious is one of creating balances. Pride is only a virtue if tempered by humility. Strength of mind is a good characteristic made only more creditworthy if offset by empathy... If you want me to translate this to life in London (the real world) then it would go something along the lines of this. On one hand life costs money. You need to make enough money to make yourself happy by giving yourself the options money bring. This feeds the practical side of you. On the other hand though, life is there to be lived, you have to have that something that feeds and fuels the passions that are the fire in your belly. If you are LUCKY/FORTUNATE you will get a job that will appease both but most people are NOT that lucky so you often have to choose one over the other. I have tried the money route. Didn’t do it for me. Right now, I am trying the slightly more selfish path of just making myself plain old happy. Let’s see how we go eh? I am extremely aware of how little I have actually said here but I think you’ll have to bear with me on that. I feel like I am on a roll.

I’m no Doctor Who BUT, it have now magically shifted from three days ago to today. KAPOW. I 

have been back in Liquid Dumaguete for a full two days. BLISS. Being picked up at the airport by Gery and his wonderful semi-toothy smile was a great way to be welcomed back. A few bits and pieces have changed most noteably Alf has decided to take a (Filippino) sabbatical which is basically an indefinite period of time off with a view to freelance and study more towards becoming a marine biologist.

Interestingly this concept of low season has passed us by. It was about 3 weeks ago that I called Zoe to ask if it was ok to stay in the UK for a few more weeks. At the time, it was QUIET. Turns out that lasted a night. So, we are very lucky to have Yannick working with us on a freelance basis. He passed his IDC with Tim last year. He’s a very good instructor and a all round general good guy. He has also readily stepped in as the resident attractive European man. Good to have you here buddy. Eric is also now a key member of staff working as our Fillipino dive guide. He is a mild mannered and extremely polite young man. He is a superb, if not short term member of the team.

What else has happened? Sundancer (our boat) has been dry-docked and refurbished. Now she not only looks tremendous but is also a lot more assured in the water. Have I mentioned I love this place? It is the little things that I am slowly remembering that are serving as a gently reminder of why I am here. If it’s not the constant, chirpy, happy, background noise of people’s chattering then it’s the noise of nature and it it’s not that then it’s the sound of the ocean or the view of Mount Talinis or the rice and fish that I had for breakfast. MAYBE, it’s the water. That could easily be the case. Maybe it is laced with something? I’ll do some experiments and get back to you. I know I am not the only one because we have had many guests who were due to be here for a few days who are still here a month later. AMAZING. There is a good cross section of cultures, nations and attitudes which all contribute to the wide-rangingly positive ambience that is floating in the air.

As another day ends...

I am not happily talking to guests or busily readying gear for a dive on the Dauin coast, I am playing cards with Tim, Jim and Zoe. There are many moments where I think about home BUT there are innumerable numbers of moments where I feel blessed (in the least religious way possible). Personally, I think we all need a few instances where we are forced to take stock and re-evaluate. Sadly, it is the darker and harder times where we do this like when a family comes together in the wake of a sick loved one. In theory I should use this paragraph to sell Liquid Dumaguete HARD but I am not, this place seems to sell itself. Instead, I am going to gently encourage you to have a think about what makes you happiest and make sure that you increase the time you concentrate on doing that. If you’re at a loss, try diving. It’s awesome. Especially here. (There’s the subtle sell). Make sure you indulge yourself a bit. Make sure to take the best especially from the jaws of adversity.

I’ll leave you with a song recommendation. A friend played it to me at Christmas and then again when I was home this time. It has the lyric “Long live living... if living can be this.” Right now I feel lucky AND fortunate to be able to say these lyrics as a mantra and believe it. Make sure you can do the same too. Thank for listening.

London - I love this little old Town

Me. Working... In an office

 Believe it or not, there was a life before adventurism and even a life before beards for me and most of that period was located in a small town called London in England. This palpitation-inducingly exciting place is where I am from and still where I gently refer to as Home. So, why after all this time am I (clearly) going to start talking about it now? Honestly, because I find myself conversing with people along my way who always want to know what London town would be like if they were there with me. Hence this little communiqué which I hope will encapsulate my love of my city. My way. Just a small disclaimer which will basically state (as usual) that some of this information might be factually wayward but all mentioned with an honest heart and an eager excitement which is unique to me on a wonderful day showing friends around ‘my back garden’.

I’ll start a day with Dray Walk which is in the often hipsterish, very current and sadly ultra fashionable Shoreditch/Hoxton/Brick Lane trifector - EC1. To be more accurate, Dray Walk is a small pedestrianised street just off Brick Lane (also known as BanglaTown). Dray Walk – a little street has some of London’s coolest clothing boutiques each with their own take on the current urban sartorial climate. Sadly, last time I was there I found my favourite shop – Junky Stylings – had moved on BUT it left behind a fair few pretenders to its throne. (Turns out it has moved round the corner to Hackney Road). On top of this, there are countless (I mean that literally) second hand, vintage and uniquely HoxDitch clothing shops, market stalls, pop-up shops and jewellery store - @WORK. Clothes clothes clothes. Blah blah blah. Ok, so you’re not interested in looking on/off trend. Fine. There is Spitalfields nearby with shopping and food aplenty OR, you can go for a drink in The Big Chill bar. It is a bar. It serves booze. It plays awesome and varied music. It is usually very busy at the times you would expect but the bar staff are friendly, often funny and sometimes entertainingly moody BUT always proficient. Best whisky sour in London... Maybe. Wow. This place is like Vegas but without the flashing lights and entertainment. OH NO. You WAIT. I need to mention Rough Trade East. An independent record store/label with its ear to the ground on pretty much all types of music outside of the mainstream. It has a great atmosphere drawing on the best part of Championship Vinyl and Empire Records while putting them in the perfect location. One of the best parts is their in-store gigs. These happen OFTEN and range from up and coming bands through to Radiohead. In a RECORD STORE. Oh and they are usually free or you have to purchase the album of the performer hn advance. Massive recommendation. Take a punt on a random band and I think you will be happily surprised. Afterwards, don’t forget to go for a salt beef or smoked salmon and cream cheese beigel from the 24hour beigel shop at the TOP of Brick Lane. I am loyal to the one closest to Bethnal Green Road. Nice. I’m on the tube while writing this. I am fairly sure people are reading this as I go. I would if I was them. I love this city.

I am a huge fan of the Great British institution call the living room. That room full of soft furnishings the warmest heater and of course THE TELEVISION where people gather and ‘live’ (?!?). Back in my Champagne Charlie days, I befriended a bar manager who eventually moved on to a new bar JUST off Regents Street on a pedestrianised side street called Heddon Street. Little did I realise that he was managing what would become my go to bar in London. The Living Room. Amazing cocktails served by EXTREMELY talented and knowledgeable bar staff. I like talking to these guys because they all have interesting backgrounds PLUS they know the things about liquid alchemy that us lowly consumers would pay dearly to know. I usually give them a set of parameters and let them make me a drink of their choice usually with AMAZING results. Ask for Gareth to make a cherry amaretto sour for him and a Raspberry Colonel for her. Play my favourite game of each person orders for the other. The food is good too if not quite pricey even by London standards. Interesting fact – it used to be a post office which was featured in David Bowie’s album Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars.

Heddon Street is a London treat

As a little aside, Heddon Street is a GEM. Pedestrianised (I seem to be obsessed with pedestrianisation). It is lined with nice restaurants, clubs and bars including Strawberry Moons - HORRIBLE except for the fact it was the first club I went to when I was 16 - Momo – an upmarket Morrocan place which serves the Momo Special. A DEE-LIGHTFUL cocktail and OUTSTANDING food (again pricey) – and finally Tibits – a buffet style vegetarian restaurant where they charge you based on the weight of you meal so aim for the alfalfa sprouts.

The Soho Special. If I had a child I would want it to look
like this

If you were to ask me what a perfect night: on a date, with friends or on your own (I have actually done this) would start at the aforementioned Living Room and then a wander through Carnaby Street then on to one of my favourite ‘things’ which is the GIANT plug on the corner of Marshall Street (opposite Marsala Zone which is a find in itself). Eventually arrive at (what used to be) a perfect little secret – Bodeans - which is London’s prime BBQ smokehouse. The ground floor is good for dining informally sitting at shared tables or the basement is ‘proper’ seated dining. Personally, being a compulsive face wiper when eating, I LOVE that they have a roll of kitchen towel always within arms’ reach as well as a variety of sauces including their house Chipotle BBQ sauce. Basically. Eat pulled pork. Drink Sam Adams. Get mess on your face. Wipe it off. Go for a long walk afterwards. Sleep well. I ALWAYS order the Soho Special (sandwich) and an extra mayonnaise helping for the side. You’ll see why. They are open until 11ish so a perfect post cocktails feed. If you don’t fancy sticky messy tasty food then try Busaba round the corner – glorious Thai influenced East Asian cuisine. To be honest, if you like squid then go there for that alone. Their Thai Calamari with green pepper corns and ginger is OUTSTANDING, a life-changer. Perchance one happens to be around there during the day, head over to So High SoHo (on Berwick Street) to have a glimpse into the dress-up counter-culture.

If. IF. You were of a mind to listen to my advice then you would go for a decent constitutional walk ideally with some music in your ears or a person at your side and a contented spring in your step. You would gently head North (ish) towards a magical land called Fitzrovia and hopefully to the Fitzroy Garden Square. Stay there for a little while. Absorb the you are in central London but have found a pristinely quiet place to gather your thoughts of an evening.

Isn't it beautiful

Picture the scene. It’s evening. It’s sunny (you might need to use your imagination). You’re in central London and you stumble across a place called Primrose Hill. It sounds lovely. It is lovely. I love parks. I love open spaces. I even really like trees and grass and benches. Primrose Hill not only sounds delightfully quaint BUT it is honestly a ruby in the dust. I would suggest taking a bottle of something to drink, a rug to sit on and a blanket to curl up in (not matter what time of year you go) and be sure to pack a warm sense of content. Have a few drinks, share some company and THEN order a pizza from Firezza or if you’re like me then Dominos. I have done this a few times and the last time I ordered an extra one to give away to people. Amazing how quickly a barter economy can be initiated these days, especially if you have pizza on offer. If you don’t fancy pizza in the park head to Lemonia on Regent’s Park Road. Probably the BEST atmosphere, tastiest Greek food and brilliant service all rolled into one. G’waaan. Treat yourself.

Let’s say you found yourself in the London Bridge area. What to do? Oh GOSH. WHAT to do. Fear not, I have THE perfect way to spend a morning, lunchtime or evening. It is cheap and accessible to EVERYone. You go for a walk towards Lambeth Palace (so you will need to head West). If you have thought it through you’ll pick up provisions from Borough Market and maybe something to sup for the way. I recommend a roast pork sandwich, some fancy browner-than-brown bread, a chunk of (24 month old) Comte and a few dark ales. By the way, there is ACTUALLY a Comte stand if you were worried. Head passed Shakespeare’s commemorative window in Southwark Cathedral and then onwards to the river. There is a path that runs all the way along the riverside. You’ll be lucky enough to pass many MANY pubs, the Globe Theatre, the Tate Modern (be sure to enter from the East Turbine Hall entrance for maximum impact), the Millennium Bridge, the London Eye, opposite the Houses of Parliament and finally Lambeth Palace and its Museum of Garden History. Rock and roll people. This walk is possibly even MORE beautiful at night. Perhaps drop in to the terrace outside the Southbank centre. The Southbank Centre has a brilliant selection of venues so have a look in advance and take a risk with seeing something new – my favourite punt was going to see Shlomo’s premier performance of Concerto for Beatbox.

LOOK! What fun he is having (that's not me)

You’re still full of beans and in the mood to park-hop? Onwards and upwards then. Head NorthEast towards the House of Parliament, through Parliament Square and take a look at its resident protestors some of whom I think are inspirational, others are examples of what is wrong in the world. First stop is St James’ Park with its rare birds which live on their lake. Seriously, there are a pair of pelicans and a few black swans to say the least. Through Green Park and on to Hyde Park. The jewel in London’s crowd. This is one of my first stops whenever I am back in Blighty. I adore/love/cherish this spectacular area of greenery. If you do nothing else, go to the Serpentine Gallery and then onto the Serpentine itself and take a rowing boat out for an hour with the paper and a cup of tea. AAAAAAAAAAH. England.

I am finding it hard to tell a story or find a way of integrating these next hotspots into a plan so I will just blurt them out. Go to Highgate Woods. Go to Highgate and drink at ALL the pubs there. THEN. Go to The Boogaloo and dance a lot to the most wonderful variety of music ranging fromr 50s RnB through to cutting edge folktronica. I love it there. It is small. It has sticky floors. It has soul.

I appreciate I have said a lot about walking here and eating there and looking up at things. I hope I have given you some simple ideas. One that doesn’t get too much simpler involves a bit of personal transport - ideally a car or a bicycle but preferably a car. Failing all of this. Walk it.  Basically. Go into the city and drive around AT NIGHT. Get lost. Marvel at the little bits and pieces. I stress that you should do this at night so it is quieter. There are few things as serene as an empty city. When you get peckish head towards the South end of Edgware Road (it is a VERY long road) to where all the Middle Eastern restaurants are. Pick one that looks nice (I have no direct preference although Ranoush is great) or has a long queue and be ready for anyone who speaks the lingo to jump the queue. Order a chicken shwrama or a spicy lamb shwarma with a melon juice – has to be experienced to be understood. To the untrained eye, this looks like a doner kebab but these far surpass anything you will have eaten from your local ‘bab dealer. Preferably you would finish around dawn so you can see the sun rise over the Thames and be tucked up in bed before the rest of London catches on to what you are doing.

Life is too short for me to write EVERYTHING I would want to do if I was back in London for a week so here is a list of other bits and pieces:

Go to a gig in the Union Chapel. Go to a gig anywhere.

Go for a crepe from the Crepe de Hampstead.

Listen to Miserere by The Cat Empire

Go for a Burger at Hard Rock Cafe – it might sound touristy/clichéd BUT well worth it and the Californian is surprisingly wonderful

Take the Tube (yeah I’m a masochist) in rush hour mainly to see why people get so pissed off with it

If you MUST, then go and check out Westfield shopping centre in Shepherd’s Bush. It’s a super high-end shopping mall

Go see my Dad in Wembley - he's nice - and my Mum - she's super sweet.

I guess you should check out the Olympic Park (although I haven’t)

I need to state my undying love for my country – England -  and its capital city... the WORLD’S capital city - London. I miss you more than crumpets dear friend.

As usual. I love you all,

Ads x

DiveMaster Life - a proleptic retrospective

The Dream Team

It has been an interesting generic period of time since the last time our literary paths crossed. I am, for once, not remorseful about the looseness of the consistency of my communications because, for once, I have been actually real-world busy.

The view I force myself out of bed for

I am becoming more involved with life at LD which I am immensely happy about. Naturally, this means I am maybe staying here a little while longer than initially planned so that means that you have more time to come and see me or if you’ve already been once before, then you have ample time to convert that yearning into come back here. It is rare that I will ever admit to this but my Dad has said for quite some time that I should work in the hospitality industry and I always gently (internally) agreed with him but I never really knew HOW on EARTH I could make that transition. It turns out that I have done it accidentally and have destiny and good fortune to thank for giving me this path. Thanks destiny. Thanks good fortune. You’re both awesome.

Look at the concentration on Isac's face

THIS is a Mola Mola. Yeah, I know, it looks like an alien

The last month has been almost utopian in the mix of the guests we have had ranging from two ultra laidback Chinese through to the Beer Jenga loving Scandanavian contingent and so the days continue to wander by sountracked by laughter, excitement and bottles opening. It’s just another day at Liquid Dumaguete. There have been MANY days recently where I walked out of my front door, stood on the balcony and looked out over the views punctuated by coconut palms, tiny boats, gorgeous blue skies with that glorious summer-ish breeze wafting around whereupon I smile to myself and think (in Louis Armstrong’s voice) what a wonderful world. Don't get me wrong, 


the oceans seem to be blooming with the joys of spring and excitement for summer. There have been continued sightings of dolphins on the way to Apo Island and from Sumilon. Ne'er a day goes by without countless stories of turtles (juveniles and dinosaur-like adults), sea snakes and a noticeable abundance of life on the reefs. This in turn has lead to an increase in predatory species to the area. Insta-disclaimer - Let me make this clear, they are predatory to other fish NOT humans. There are some HUGE schools of Jacks, a Great Barracuda, a whole school of juvenile yellowtail barracuda, trevally, a baby Whitetip shark and an adolescent Blacktip shark. AMAZING. Oh and (holy shit) - a Mola Mola - a Sunfish was spotted just down the coast from Liquid HQ.

The Zeagle Scout BCD

As a Divemaster, you are expected to have your own equipment. I am sure I mentioned the other day that I had bought an Aquamundo QR12 first stage and an AROQ2 second stage. They are excellent – pics to follow. This means, I have the breathing apparatus sorted, I have a masks (and dorkel), a noisemaker which is a metallic pink pointer with matching weight belt my favourite blue rash guard and a fetching pair of purple and gold basketball shorts for diving in. It turns out I need a Bouyancy Compensation Device - BCD - which is basically a jacket that you can put air in or take air out of to alter your underwater buoyancy. It is also the means to hold your tank in place and store all the bits and pieces you want to take with you into the blue stuff. There are many MANY types, details and personal preferences to take into account so regardless of whether you like it or not, I will explain why I chose the one I chose - the Zeagle Scout. My prerequisites include the need for a comfortable harness with an easily adjustable fitting system, a back mounted air bladder, lightweight when dry and versatile. I have taken advice and recommendations from many people and I am VERY excited to play with it when I get it. HURRAY!! 

It's not all work work work

It has been a nice time to sit back and think about how life has moved on to the current tangent. I have been a qualified PADI Divemaster for 3 months now and I seem to be enjoying it more and more everyday. If you imagine that is was a year ago today that I first emailed Zoe after a drunken conversation with Gav, a mutual friend of mine and Zoe's, about coming to Liquid. Having signed up for an initial 6 months, you have to remember that I do not think I had ever snorkeled before, I can honestly say that I regret NOTHING. THe life of a DM is not all sleeping on boats, sleeping on sofas or sleeping on the ground. There is diving to do, equipment to talk about and people to please. The INTERESTING thing for me is looking back to my humble diving beginnings and now understanding how they helped prepare me for doing what I do now. From the day arrived I knew I would be being trained in the right place by the right people seeing as the instructor to DMT ratio is usually about 1 on 1 or better (bearing in mind there are 5 instructors living and 'working' here at the moment).

I DO do stuff. HONESTLY I do!! 

Something that surprised me was how useful it was to talk to guests/customers/divers about their experiences and expectations which was made easier by to open plan communal spaces. EVERY NIGHT without fail you will hear talk amongst the hubub about dive gear, best practice, amazing sites and the inevitable nights out that precede too many early mornings after. From a trainee's point of view, the instructors or scheduling overlords employ the stick and carrot method to incentivise you. If you work hard, push yourself and go the extra mile (e.g. cleaning gear even if you are not diving) you will enjoy life much more. The package is set up to help minimise daily living costs and negate the need for additional diving cost so your biggest expense is usually the bar tab, the academic materials as well as any gear you may choose to buy for yourself. The best part for me happened without me really noticing until the time was long passed - you basically end up guiding dives and learning about dive shop operations by the time you finish. THAT is the part I really liked and is super transferable. Interestingly for me, it was not until I had been to other dive shops and seen how they run that I realised what a well run and tight operation Liquid has. Let's not forget that you live, entrenched in a team of like minded people whom you can learn with and from with the prospect of the next beer or Dumatini just a few hours away! Hurrah!! 


I know I talk the big talk about life here but I refuse to use anything but gentle exaggeration, hyperbole and superlatives. To put it bluntly, I am called ALL of YOU out on this. Come find out for yourself (that I am right). I would love to see you.


For now my friends,


Massive amounts of Love (with a capital L),


BeardFace

SEE! Me Demonstrating a 'BSAC ascent'

I WILL have my Gato and eat it... Malapascua is becoming slightly addicitive

If you have taken the time to watch this video, you are part of a collective who, with my guidance, are trying to rip apart the fabric of time. Please take care not to think too much about what I am about to say because it could cause cerebral damage.What you are watching, is me watching a camera filming me writing these words. Technically, if I re-watch this clip I am fairly sure I will open up a wormhole to another dimension. PLEASE be careful and whatever you do NOT put the video player on repeat.

As most of you might know or understand of me, the days of the week are fairly abstract in their meanings and necessity. OBVIOUSLY I understand that the concept of the Gregorian calendar and without days of the week, TECHNICALLY there would be no weekend... or weeks. Would there still be years? Would the year become the equivalent of the week? So instead of there being weekends there would be year ends. Year end - a combination of words that send a chill through my heart. Year. End. *shudders* Those accountant or finance types will understand and for those of you who did not know, in my former life I masqueraded as a management accountant -BLEURGH). Having just re-read this, I am also aware that either the heat or island life might be effecting my mental state. My brain seems to be enjoying it though.

Since the misguided, miscalculation of drinking all night and then diving first thing the next morning I have napped a fair amount, wandered around the island a little bit, eaten Lechon Baboi - spitroast pig - which seems to be becoming an integral part of my weekly schedule. On top of this, St. Patrick's day has been and gone, good food has been eaten, drinks shared with new and old friends alike, our man in Finland - Jari - has come out for a few days diving and possibly starting along the tech diving road. All in all. Wonderful things continue to happen.

The swim-through to
Shark Cave

Gato Island

There is a certain pretense I employ. I HATE the notion (with a military guerilla passion) of 'ticking things off' the list of life e.g. doing countries. Same when it comes to diving. All's well and good but there are definitely things that I have a heighten desire to see. So having seen the thresher sharks, Dona Marilyn wreck and done some muck diving I was running out of sites I 'had' to go to. Our Old Friend suggested just one more - Gato Island - and to my luck there was a two dive day trip going. Hurrah for those in charge of scheduling at Evolution. I was excited and I had a dive buddy going from a previous dive. What a delight. Gato Island delivered. I will paraphrase but Dive 1 started by swimming through a huge stone 'gate' down into the site where we were able to see white tip sharks sleeping in a small cave, many nudibranch, a hilarious number of sea urchins EVERYWHERE which forces you to maintain your bouyancy control, banded sea snakes and a pair of pipefish - one juvenile. Gorgeous.

Dive 2 was the swim-through. Something Our Old Friend had implored me to go to. Imagine going through a tunnel about the half the size of a London Underground Tube, it was dark, and about 30 metres long and then it narrows before opening up into a spectacular cave about the size of a Mongolian Ger (the round tents). I appreciate that that is a very obscure reference but I cannot think of anything else. Oh and in this cave there were 4-5 white tip sharks circling nonchalantly. One think I wanted to see on this trip was a shark or two. I now want to see many many more or these creatures. Their aggressive shape and reputation does not do justice to their grace and visual impact. WOW. Pure and utter WOW. I have to credit Esteban and Fiore for the photos of the tunnel. The site opened out into some amazing rock formation and we were also lucky enough to spot a rare Pigmy Seahorse which was smaller  than my little finger. Awesome. The rest of the dive descended into madness with me stealing my dive buddy's fin and swimming off amongst other high jinx.

I'm a Mandarin fish. That's what I do.

I am unsure whether I have talked about this concept before so humor me a second. Night Diving. It's like DIVING diving but it is done at night time this wouldn't be all that special if you lived in Svaalbad during summer BUT here in the real world it gets dark at night. So, in essence, night diving is diving in the dark, but the other interesting aspect is drawn from the different creatures that emerge at this time. We were diving House Reef with Evolution Dive shop as usual. Upon arrival there was dacu sug - big current - which is not conducive for slowly looking for little critters... in the dark. Mission abort. Repeat ABORT and re-locate to Lighthouse. This was a quiet blessing in disguise as there was a greater chance of seeing Mandarin Fish a gorgeous and skittish little fish that is fairly unique to this part of the world. I will use Shelagh, the resident DM at Evolution's description, that they look like a Picasso painting and I think that that makes some sense. You thoughts? It was fun for me because I got to dive with Jari for the first time and as usual, I just like being in the water. I spotted a few things here and there blah blah blah UNTIL, I noticed a small shadow in my light beam and assumed it was dirt on the lens. Nope. Ok, well, err. think Ads. What is it? THINK. I looked around and almost by chance I noticed a spec about the size of my little finger nail bang in the middle of my light beam. It was a teeny TINY squid. AWESOME. Then, right on cue, in the peripheries of my light, I saw a flash of iridescent blue - my favourite type of iridescence - it was a larger squid about the size of my thumb darting about give me the eye (not in a good way). I love squid. I love cuttlefish. I love octopus.

Bobtail squid

This curiosity stems from my illustrated encyclopedia of animals which I considered my bible when I was little. I am fairly sure that book formulated the foundation of my love of animals. My love for these cephalopod runs DEEP to the point of considered not eating them any more. This is a big statement because, as most of you know. I LOVE EATING SQUID. They are pretty much my go-to for comfort food. Anyway. This little fella just sat there for me and my buddy to stare at. An unforgettable moment. It was a nice swansong to finish my diving with on Malapascua.

We came, we saw, we dived.



I have to admit that my time here has been a treat. Diving with Evolution, hanging out at the bar, joking around with their boat crew and bar staff has been super-relaxing. It is no coincidence in my opinion that Matt and David who are the owners at Evolution are so successful on this island and that they share a good relations with Tim and Zoe - our fearless leaders at Liquid. They are doing it right. One day, if/when I have a family and they want to 'do' some diving then this place will be high on my list. Thanks to everyone here. Somehow you sparkle more brightly than the sea on a clear night with a full moon.

I'm not particularly sure why and it hasn't featured too heavily in my life in the past BUT the song Hold On by Alabama Shakes has been going round and round in my head. It will forever remind me of this magical island and the memories and friendships forged here. They sound bluesy with a wondrous touch of gospel vocals and a rock formula epitomized Kings of Leon. It might not set your life alight but it will give you a shimmy to your shake when it gets stuck in your head. Until the next time my friends. Look after yourself and be good to eachother.

Much love,

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Dauin, I'm cheating on you... with Malapascua

Sometimes in life you look elsewhere for something new. It can manifest as food envy like when someone orders something that you wish you had. It can be fish envy where another group of divers saw a juvenile, pigmy, flambouyant manta fish (they don't REALLY exist). OR. It can be purely to experience something new and different. I am not for a minute condoning cheating, adultery or cuckoldry BUT I am suggestively suggesting you try new things. It is with this in mind that i metaphorically jumped on Our Old Friend's back on his way to his alma mater - Malapascua Island, Philippines.

"Lads on tour - the journey of awesomeness"

Forget Frodo, the Ring and Mordor we had a hefty 12-18 hour journey ahead - there was DEFINITELY some elasticity in the timings of things. One simply does not GO to Malapascua. We both knew it would be an interesting enterprise when it was a better idea for us to get out the pedi cab and walk for the first kilometre. We kinda missed our first bus but that turned out to be a blessing because we headed for a different ferry and THAT turned out to be much faster. A Ceres (bus) liner was waiting and we boarded to Cebu City - the Big Smoke. Let me explain that Ceres Liners are air-conditioned coaches driven by what I can only assume are trainee Filippino Rally Drivers although, in their defence, the faster they drive the shorter journey.

The Liquid - Aquamundo partnership continues

We arrived in Cebu, the land of buildings, roads, cars and hookers. We had already planned to do some gear shopping but when we found out that there was a TGI Friday's in the Ayala Mall we decided to stay for the night. It was a good choice. We visited AquaMundo who supply the Liquid Dive shop with most of their equipment and were greeted as old friends and treated exceptionally well. I cannot recommend them high enough for the customer service, their product quality, price and also the after-sale service. THANK YOU Joey and the team for your help.

Dona Marilyn - spooky huh

We drank and ate with gay abandon until we had to go home due to over filling. The next day was prefixed by a lunatic cab driver, another bus that we jumped on as it was leaving which is easier said than done with Our Old Friend's 30kg bag of (tech) dive gear and then suffixed by a joyful banker boat ride to Malapascua. It is all too easy to start shouting about white sand this and clear oceans that but for me, it is the closeness of the community here that has fueled the fire in my heart most.



I dived the Dona Marilyn wreck on my first full day and after two almost identical (in a good way) dives I can honestly say I have seen what a huge passeneger ferry looks like when it sinks. This particular ship sank in October 1988 during Typhoon Ruby in 130knot winds. It is slightly spooky and macabre to think that so many people sadly lost their lives in that spot. It was something I pondered while at 30metres. 

Hello my thresher sharky friend

Naturally a fella of my inquisitive nature cannot come to Malapascua and NOT go to see the thresher sharks so me and Our Kid decided to get absolutely obliterated and I ended staying up until 3:30am. This isn't that big of a deal until you realise that the thresher shark dives a Monad leave at 530am. So after one FULL hour's sleep, I was up and at 'em. I felt woefully bad but nothing a few dry heaves did not fix. Honestly, I was fairly underwhelmed. The sharks themselves were beautiful with their long ribbon tails and huge black inquisitive eyes - one of natures curious wonders. *ALERT - SOAP BOX MOMENT*. I don’t understand why everyone is kicking up such a stink over the Oslob whale sharks and the perceived detrimental effect on the migratory pattern while the circus at Monad is going on without any fuss. It was horrible seeing that many incompetent divers ripping up and breaking so much coral. It broke my heart a little bit and tainted the whole experience for me. I would love to encourage you to see the sharks (here)but I genuinely would rather the the fewer people diving there the better. Rant over-ish. I am sorry if i have trodden on anyone's toes or upset anyone BUT, like I said, I am disappointed (said in a Dad voice) that this continues to go on with no backlash. I'd happily hear your thoughts though.


I expect that most evening with continue along the lines of drinking at the Craic House - the Evolution bar - or going visiting and inevitably drinking Filippino style. Drinking Filippino style?What's all this jazz about? In the words of Destiny's Child, I don't think you're ready for this jelly... Basically, everyone sits round, and you all drink for one glass in turn. There is a gunner who is responsible for replenishing the drinking utensil with whatever the communal drink is (usually Tanduay or Red Horse / Gold Eagle - strong beer) and it also the gunner is sets the resulting pace for the night. Usually the faster the pace the better. So much so that if you take too long to drink you are berated with quips along the lines of "are you growing a tree in that". My personal favourite is "a man's not a camel. DRINK". Filippinos like to drink. I like to drink. We are a match made in heaven. Sometimes a drunken match made in heaven... but as long as heaven is there then all is well. Right? 

THIS is a useful reminder. Thanks Cebu

The day that made me smile to the core of my heart

I am only half a man without my pipe

Friends, another period of time has passed and thankfully we are reunited with our physical and mental health intact. For once I shan’t go down the faux-extistensial route about how fragile life is and how much we should cherish every second. Instead, I am going to tell you the story of what I consider to be the best full day – start to finish – almost since I first arrived here.  I appreciate that this a bold and superlative fuelled statement but I have slept on it for a few days and I stand by it.

Liquid Deco Shots - they're dangerously moorish

I will provide you with a little back story for your literary delectation. The resort has been FULL almost to the point of referring to its fullness as chock-a-block which is good for many reasons but mainly because a full resort is a happy resort. All the DMs and DMTs are busy, there is a full diving schedule and the gentle hubbub has been turned up to a roaring cauldron of activity. I have moved out of the DM village and into Grandma Darlene and Grandpa Al’s house with Our Old Friend as acting caretakers which I am very happy about not only because we get on very well BUT because it is nice to have your own self contained space AND the number of hilariously conjugated retorts never ceases to amaze me. Oh and the Liquid Deco Shots have been flowing.

Jari doing his thing

We have a new Rescue Diver/DMT to accompany Berlinda in the ‘journey’ to DiveMasterdom. His name is Jari from Finland and he will be juuuuust fine. If you imagine arriving to a new home to a game of Beer Jenga which had been underway for a while (therefore a fair few drunken people around), he settled straight in to bantering and drinking like a trooper. Welcome Jari. We look forward to many MANY more nights ahead.

The restaurant has been through a bit of a re-structuring under the guidance of Elin and so far the new roles are working like a dream. The standard has somehow increased with a new tinge of variation and much as it feels like a silly thing to talk about - the seasoning is now exemplary. I do have to add a small side point which relates to dessert. You and I already have preconceptions as to what ingredients usually furnish the sweet course of a meal so have a think on this – coconut porridge or maja blanca (coloured blue not white) with sweetcorn or banana and CHEESE crepes. Let me explain now thought that 90% of the time the desserts are magnificent but I had to give an honourable mention to these three.

For those of you who know me, I like to get a job done and I like to do it well. The hallowed day that I speak of is one of those rarities where I came away feeling like I could have done nothing better than what I did. The last few days had been busy in a fairly arbitrary way. I am affectionately known by the other local DMs as a DRIVEMaster as well as a DiveMaster because they see me driving the dive jeep as often as they see me leading dives. I have acted as an interim boat mechanic (I love getting messy trying to fix stuff); a dive guide and buoyancy guru, a never ending source of local knowledge, a cocktail developer as well as a focus for humour and beer. It was on a day punctuated by driving, carrying, liaising, smiling and planning.

The Cars - one Ferrari and one BMW

We had two new guests from Taiwan who were pretty serious divers and photographers who had been left in my charge to take them for two coastal dives using the Lobster. First of all, I LOVE driving that vehicle (it somewhere between a car and a tank). Secondly, as you know, I like to help newbies and pass on something I love, BUT it is wonderfully refreshing to dive without having to worry as much about your fellow divers’ ability. I was a TOUCH nervous because it is often the divemaster’s job to find little critters, interesting things to see as well as showing the dive site, this becomes increasingly prevalent with the divers’ ability mainly because the more ‘run of the mill’ fish you have seen, sadly, the less they are the focus for photographers. We were going to a site called Cars. Why is it called Cars? Is this a whitty, kooky joke? Nope. Basically there are two cars and a bunch of other foreign metal object sunk in the water at around 25metres. But this is pollution no? Under managed circumstances metal objects vastly encourage marine growth and much more so than natural organic matter. It will take around 6months for a metal object to be teeming with life whereas wood will take a few years to become ensconced with macro life.

Scorpion Fish

Ornate Ghost PipeFish

We walked into the water from the shore and meandered our way towards the cars. Me being me, I decided to take an alternative route via a few mooring blocks I knew of an BINGO we started off with a Donald duck shrimp and three sleeping juvenile lion fish. Confidence was on its way up. We moved deeper along the slope and found a few small coral lumps and some tangled rope where Cathy found a beautiful flamboyant cuttlefish – AWESOME. The three of us were a good team. I searched out the broader area ahead, I would alert Cathy to what I had found and she would wait for Star to come with his huge sea monster of a camera rig.  Star was busily and expertly taking photos always being careful not to get in anyone’s way or interrupting our marine hosts. I will not over describe what else happen EXCEPT what we found: two species of moray eels intertwined together, a scorpion fish, a large Sea Moth with iridescent blue fin tips, a bunch (not sure of the collective noun) of Lion fish – BEAUTIFULLY DANGEROUS, glass shrimp and 5, yes FIVE ornate ghost pipefish. The pipefish were a huge deal for me because I had never found ANY on my own before and they were the FIRST critters I was ever shown back on my first dive with DM Dan back in the day. Back then I had not real interest or understanding of the skill it takes to spot these tiny, camouflaged creatures so there was a nice circularity there for me.

There was a tidy little challenge embedded within this dive because it appears the Star and Cathy did not really need to breathe underwater, so for the first time in a LONG time, I was having to carefully monitor and ration my air consumption. It turns out that after an hour dive with most of it at a decent depth which increases consumption speed due to increased pressure and therefore air density, (well within our deco limits), we all finished with about a third of our air left. AWESOME DIVE. I could quite happily say that it was one of the best dives I have ever had the honour of being on let alone led. Adam = Happy BeardFace. The rest of the day panned out nicely, with fun and laughter, drinks were drunk and stories were shared. BLISS.

Since then I have lead many MANY customers around and continue to see amazing and beautiful creatures. I think I am in love with the ocean a little bit. I now have a favourite nudibranch (literal translation – naked lung because they breathe through their skin) Funeral Jurona. Having a favourite nudibranch was something I always gently scoffed at when i first started diving however, now I understand what the fuss is about. Look them up. 

Life here is becoming increasingly addictive. The people I call my friends are slowing setting up camp the long term section of my heart and I continue to look forward to writing to you. ALL OF YOU.

I have not been listening to as much music as usual BUT somehow (and I am not usually a fan) but FatBoy Slim’s – Don’t Let The man Get You down(Pay Your Debts) has been on constant rotation in my brain. Maybe it’s the aptness of the line “and the long haired freaky people need not apply...”

I hope whatever you are doing and wherever you are, I find you in good health and high spirits. I cannot wait to see you again and when I do... HUGS ALL ROUND!!! Hurroo!!

Love as usual,

BeardFace

A special thanks to Star, Mark Pacey and Anna for letting me use their photos in this blog!

PS. TELL YOUR FRIENDS

PPS. Yeah, that is a photo of me with a magnifying glass and 'smoking' my pipe while diving

Films that I have enjoyed watching with my eyes

For those of you who know me well, you will be aware (as I have previously stated) that music is my biggest day-to-day passion. Whenever I get the chance to engineer a music-listening situation I take it. I think it would be a dream come true if I could work in music radio. I have also already written about ‘a few of’ the books that have nudged me towards being out here. In my head, there is only one relevant omission in this tripartite of personal inspirations and that is films. I am DEFINITELY not a film buff and I have not seen many films that others would call classics or must sees but I know what I like and I generally like what I have seen. I shan’t pre-amble too much so let’s do this.

I’ll be vaguely chronological and list the films in the order they came into my life:

The Blues Brothers. Jake, Elwood, THE BAND and one the greatest supporting casts ever, right up there with Escape to Victory. I first saw this when I was quite young. Young enough to deeply cherish the music but more importantly, one of the greatest cars chases of all times BUT old enough know what swearing was and that it was naughty. It blends action, humour and music seamlessly. There is a gentle background plot of trying to raise enough cash to save an orphanage which is fun but it the constant surprises and semi-surreal lunacy that is ever present throughout the film right down to the closing scene. I am not sure how it DIRECTLY inspired me to wander off into the world but I am fairly sure that this film slightly helped mould me into the person I am today... and it has this quote:

“It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses. Hit it.”- Jake and Elwood Blues

One of my favourite indulgences in life is listening to and telling stories and I’ll listen to pretty much anyone. When I saw a trailer for Big Fish I was pretty excited, so much so that I did not see it in the cinema or when it came out on DVD but about 3 years later when one of my flat mates own and let it to me. I like Ewan McGregor and he plays the protagonist - Edward Bloom in the re-telling of his life stories and the myths he told of himself. The colourfulness of the patchwork the Tim Burton brings together is truly invigorating. I think I love this film, and forgive me for sounding narcissistic, because it reminds me of me a little and how I want to live my life and be remembered. There is also a line that has always stuck with me. It goes a little something like this:

“ Now I may not have much, but I have more determination then any man you're ever likely to meet”- Ed Bloom

Into the Wild is the most obvious and clearly direct influence on my life as it stands at the moment. The story is based around a young fella who graduates from high school as valedictorian (whatever that means) and gives all his college fund to charity and disappears off on the road on a journey to the hallowed land – Alaska. He gives himself the road name of Alexander SuperTramp a direct influence on me giving myself the name WonderBear (capital W, capital B). The stories he tells, the pace at which he lives his life and the priorities he aligns himself to are very similar to those that I aspire to PLUS, my first trip away ten years ago was a convoluted journey to Alaska. It is a must see... and one day, I will get to Slab City the setting for some of my favourite scenes. As an added bonus, the Eddie Vedder written score is brilliant enough to stand alone as an album. I know it sounds a bit clichéd but I hold the following mantra pretty close to my heart:

“The core of mans' spirit comes from new experiences” – Alexander SuperTramp

KickAss – a modern day fable about one man’s desire to make the world a little bit better with a slight tinge of what some might call vigilantism. The vivid colours, graphic fight scenes and bold plotline are directly correlated to its origin as a comic book. KickAss’ message evolved around not just idly standing by while someone is being wronged. He finds something and gets involved – a phrase I coined for myself while trying to build up some positive momentum a few years back. I admit that it is not the deepest film nor the most unique but it can be quite an inspiring film if you allow yourself to be swept along in it. Let’s face it, ANY film that has a twelve year old girl as an untouchably hardcore superhero is going to be fun.

“Guys, doesn't it bug you? Like, thousands of people wanna be Paris Hilton and nobody wants to be Spiderman” - Dave Lizewski

I would love to hear your thoughts although I am not going to commit to agreeing with them to them but I promise I will at LEAST read them...

Happy viewing,

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