Happiness - It's taken for granted all too often

 It’s one of those things isn’t it? I know that I am very fortunate (and maybe a LITTLE bit lucky) to be able to live the life I do.  I feel the need to explain the difference. Fortune is something that an individual can directly influence e.g. being able to find traction to stay in the Philippines because I (hope) I have earned it whereas luck is this abstract, some might say karmic, invisible force that randomly affects people along the way.

'Conquering' Sarawak, Borneo

Over the last 12/13 months I have adventured in the jungles, discovered the underwater worlds of the Philippines and spent time in my be-loved London. I think that you guys have enjoyed reading my writings as much as I have enjoyed producing them. I feel quite privileged that I have the stories to tell and the people to listen to them and for that, I thank you. Yes. YOU.

Spreading my 'good word' through
the Philippines

I appreciate I have been a tiny bit absent of late. I am not altogether sure as to why that has been the case either so I have decided that I will not be as arbitrary with my communications. I write as I sit here waiting to board a flight from Terminal 3 at NAIA Manila to Dumaguete – a place I call my home away from home... Duma-G not the airport. Why am I so excited? Well. If you were to ask me to say the first things that pop into my head it would go something along the lines of:

Seeing Tim and Zoe

Massive bro-hug with Jim

Soly and Kai’s big smiley faces

ALL of the staff. Can’t wait for a barrage of people calling my Byran (Adams), bum patting from the 

boat crew, trying to learn Visayan with the house keeping ladies, banter with the kitchen crew... oh gosh. EVERYONE

Getting into the water (and playing with my new gear)

Diving. Full stop.

The Sun. The Sea. The Sky. Capital S’s intentional

My family. Those who helped me
create MY balance and give me the support and 

I don’t know why but my heart skips a beat at the thought. My theory or life philosophy if you want me to be pretentious is one of creating balances. Pride is only a virtue if tempered by humility. Strength of mind is a good characteristic made only more creditworthy if offset by empathy... If you want me to translate this to life in London (the real world) then it would go something along the lines of this. On one hand life costs money. You need to make enough money to make yourself happy by giving yourself the options money bring. This feeds the practical side of you. On the other hand though, life is there to be lived, you have to have that something that feeds and fuels the passions that are the fire in your belly. If you are LUCKY/FORTUNATE you will get a job that will appease both but most people are NOT that lucky so you often have to choose one over the other. I have tried the money route. Didn’t do it for me. Right now, I am trying the slightly more selfish path of just making myself plain old happy. Let’s see how we go eh? I am extremely aware of how little I have actually said here but I think you’ll have to bear with me on that. I feel like I am on a roll.

I’m no Doctor Who BUT, it have now magically shifted from three days ago to today. KAPOW. I 

have been back in Liquid Dumaguete for a full two days. BLISS. Being picked up at the airport by Gery and his wonderful semi-toothy smile was a great way to be welcomed back. A few bits and pieces have changed most noteably Alf has decided to take a (Filippino) sabbatical which is basically an indefinite period of time off with a view to freelance and study more towards becoming a marine biologist.

Interestingly this concept of low season has passed us by. It was about 3 weeks ago that I called Zoe to ask if it was ok to stay in the UK for a few more weeks. At the time, it was QUIET. Turns out that lasted a night. So, we are very lucky to have Yannick working with us on a freelance basis. He passed his IDC with Tim last year. He’s a very good instructor and a all round general good guy. He has also readily stepped in as the resident attractive European man. Good to have you here buddy. Eric is also now a key member of staff working as our Fillipino dive guide. He is a mild mannered and extremely polite young man. He is a superb, if not short term member of the team.

What else has happened? Sundancer (our boat) has been dry-docked and refurbished. Now she not only looks tremendous but is also a lot more assured in the water. Have I mentioned I love this place? It is the little things that I am slowly remembering that are serving as a gently reminder of why I am here. If it’s not the constant, chirpy, happy, background noise of people’s chattering then it’s the noise of nature and it it’s not that then it’s the sound of the ocean or the view of Mount Talinis or the rice and fish that I had for breakfast. MAYBE, it’s the water. That could easily be the case. Maybe it is laced with something? I’ll do some experiments and get back to you. I know I am not the only one because we have had many guests who were due to be here for a few days who are still here a month later. AMAZING. There is a good cross section of cultures, nations and attitudes which all contribute to the wide-rangingly positive ambience that is floating in the air.

As another day ends...

I am not happily talking to guests or busily readying gear for a dive on the Dauin coast, I am playing cards with Tim, Jim and Zoe. There are many moments where I think about home BUT there are innumerable numbers of moments where I feel blessed (in the least religious way possible). Personally, I think we all need a few instances where we are forced to take stock and re-evaluate. Sadly, it is the darker and harder times where we do this like when a family comes together in the wake of a sick loved one. In theory I should use this paragraph to sell Liquid Dumaguete HARD but I am not, this place seems to sell itself. Instead, I am going to gently encourage you to have a think about what makes you happiest and make sure that you increase the time you concentrate on doing that. If you’re at a loss, try diving. It’s awesome. Especially here. (There’s the subtle sell). Make sure you indulge yourself a bit. Make sure to take the best especially from the jaws of adversity.

I’ll leave you with a song recommendation. A friend played it to me at Christmas and then again when I was home this time. It has the lyric “Long live living... if living can be this.” Right now I feel lucky AND fortunate to be able to say these lyrics as a mantra and believe it. Make sure you can do the same too. Thank for listening.

(Some of) The Music that inspires me to be here

It has been a quieter week for me this week. This does not mean less happened BUT it does mean that I MIGHT wander off-subject even more than normal. It got me a’thinking about the whats and the wheres. I know, I always say something like this so as to gently drift into a faux-philosophical ‘closing thought.’ I am aware of this so please do not hold it against me, I have never pretended to be a great writer neither have I ever alluded to being anything but a fella with a beard. Read on or not, it’s your choice.

I thought that instead of drip feeding you bits and pieces of inspiration, I would give you a creative foundation of influences upon which I have build my mental state. Some areas, such as music, are much more fluid and change daily/hourly/minutely(??) but other areas mainly books and films are fairly rigid and hard to impregnate. In this musical sojourn , I have concentrated more on songs with home as their main theme for no other reason than home is often on my mind in a good way.

Edward Sharpe – Home. This is a song that has amazingly mixed feelings for me. It is a wonderful example of how to exemplify loving sentiments with happy noises. I love it. Sadly, it is tied up in a web of memories that I would rather forget - it’s all very soap opera-ish. Home. It’s where you lay your hat. It’s where your heart is. It’s where you get fed, cleaned and watered. It’s is where you are happy enough to make a sound of utter utopian content similar to that which the girls makes at 3:42. The warm, happy jangly feel to this track makes my head think of the messes that you made and grew to love in your room when you were younger. It’s like building a blanket fort for the soul. Trust me, I have built a LOT of blanket forts.

Welcome Home by Radical Face. This conjures COMPLETELY different set of memories and emotions. It reminds me of a wonderful period in time that I spent with Jimmy McSparron - Trekkingnut in the village of Pa’ Umor in the Kelabit Highlands in Sarawak, Borneo. Despite its central theme of going/arriving home, the minute the chorus starts the build, I have a strong sense that I NEED to head out into the world and see it. It’s pretty much an irrepressible compulsion but I think that has more to do with the grand, crescendo-ing, soaring vocals and major key than the lyrical content. I I’d be curious to hear what you think.

I know wrote about him but a few weeks ago BUT Michael Kiwanuka’s Home Again still features heavily in my daily mental playlist and it also fits quite nicely with this theme. His heart-achingly raw, longingly sorrowful voice adds a wonderful depth to the intensity of this song. There is a strong sense of regret and desperate hope that he'll feel home again, in this case it seems like home is wherever SHE might be. Broken hearts, we’ve all had them, we’ve all dealt with them differently we’ve all (hopefully) bounced back stronger from them. I know that the cognitive re-visiting of such memories can have a detrimental effect but the whatever-doesn’t-kill-you-makes-you-stronger principle works with great effect here. If I weren’t for the heartbreak and anguish of 2010, I doubt I would be as happy as I am now.

It is not all about the umm-tiss umm-tiss of modern music y’know. Ave Maria sung by Maria Callas – the song that played as my Grandfather – Api – was cremated shall forever hold an intensely strong fire in my belly that makes my heart swell with pride. This was a man who talked himself and family out of many MANY difficult situations during the Magyar Revolution in the 1950. I do not think that many people know, mainly because I have never told them, that I see a great deal of Api in me. From what I know and remember, he was a proud and courageous man who held honesty and humility as important virtues. He spirit has definitely been passed down through the generations.

Lastly Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 5 in E-Flat major. Firstly it is hard to find a picture to represent this so I added one of my own.My friend Mike and I would often listen to this in the evenings in the jungles of Sarawak and drift off to our respective cerebral havens. Just so’s you know, neither Mike nor I are Beethoven. I don’t have a lot to say about this. It is glorious. It is beautiful, magnificent and reminds me why I am so happy to be alive. Give it a go.

You have to understand that these are a tiny weeny snapshot of the music that really presses my buttons and has a direct correlation to what I am thinking. If you are curious enough to see where else my audio wanderings go then have a look at my hypemachine playlist. I admit that I have not updated it recently but that is mainly because my internet connection cannot sustain the streaming music. Aaaaaaaaaah the joys of living in the third world... One day, if you are lucky I will have finished my life story and I am sure music will feature heavily there.

For now, happy listening.

Be well good people.

Love, WonderBear(d) x

Life - it's worth thinking about

It feels like a long time since I first wrote but let’s be honest with eachother, sometimes life gets busy. Yeah, I know what you are thinking but I DO do things quite often. I have daily chores and responsibilities

Firstly, I’ll give you a brief rundown of what else has been happening. Juilette and Laura are deeply entrenched in their DiveMaster training while Suzi finished hers INCLUDING the snorkel test. That’s her. The one in the pictures. PLUS a new DMT – Belinda – arrived. Hurroo!

Before

After

We have been diving at Siquijor and Sumilon a fair amount recently. I understand that I talk of these magical, mystical places full of curiosity and wonderment but why? Why?! If you’ll allow me to indulge my love of the analogy then I shall explain. If you imagine my head office – Liquid HQ – is where I work, there is the conference room (the bar); breakout rooms (the classroom and dive shop) and the training facilities (the pool). We also have a few satellite offices, partner companies and preferred suppliers – dive sites. These are the Dauin Coast, Apo Island, Siquijor, Sumilon and Oslob each of which gives us something slightly different but all equally important to us. Gotta love the corporate schpeil.

This is mainly another excuse to put a photo of myself up
BUT Siquijor is in the background

I look at Siquijor every day. I am fairly sure we all do because it is on the other side of the strait from us (it’s the island in the background there). I have been here for a while and wanted to dive over there pretty much ever since I arrived so when I was presented with the opportunity I bit off everyone’s arms.

I was doing two specialities – Deep Dive and Nitrox – so not only was I on a day trip, I was a student again. It appears I really like learning about things I like. Siquijor was dive 1 of my Deep Speciality and dive 1 of Nitrox. To make things better, Our Old Friend was my instructor. What are these specialties I speak of? Well, they are basically extensions of your certifications that allow you more options when it comes to diving and dive planning. Having the deep speciality allows me to dive to 40metres which is not necessarily important but interesting. Nitrox speciality is actually quite geeky and very cool. Basically it certifies you to dive with a different blend of compressed gas. A normal tank is filled with standard compresses air which is roughly 79% Nitrogen and 21% Oxygen whereas Nitrox is usually a higher percentage Oxygen. This does not mean you can go deeper BUT it does mean you can stay at a depth for longer as I diminishes the risk and prevalence of decompression sickness.

The day started wonderfully well with the sun shining, the seas were amazingly calm and Sundancer was ready. We were a small group and spirits were high. Once we were in the water, which was a chilly 26°C (no sarcasm – it was COLD) Our Old Friend and I descended over the edge of the wall to our target depth of 36metres did some exercises and then slowly swam along the front of the wall gradually increasing out depth exploring caves and crevices along the way. I know I keep saying depth isn’t everything and it isn’t BUT it is a weird thought to be 12 stories UNDER the water. Dive two was my first Nitrox dive and it was fun. We were able to stay deeper than the rest of the group for the same time that they dived which in this case was a technicality but being deeper can often be useful if you are diving on a wreck or looking for something in particular at a given depth.

As if this wasn’t enough the NEXT day we were heading to Sumilon to finish my Deep and, just as a sweetener, we were going to hopefully go snorkelling with the local celebrities – whale sharks. Our Old Friend was in attendance and disco Phil one of our new managers. It is very rare for the three of us to head out together so, that day was a real treat. I was going to write a fair amount about my feelings of the whale shark trip and what goes on there but I think our fearless leader – Zoe – wrote a really great article on them already. HERE. Basically, there were 2 or 3 whale sharks one of which was around 12metres. I named him Humphrey. It was kinda cool for me because I was swimming back to the boat and I saw a turtle in mid-water so I stopped to look at him for a while. THEN Humphrey swam right up behind me and said hello. So at least I got to see him on my own without all the other people there. Perfect. The dives were great. I am certified to 40metres now. The company was even better. Thanks guys.

Me with Alan (in Blue) and Roy. Captions on a postcard please

It sounds silly but these days for me are made SO much better for me by hanging out with the boat crew despite not always understanding each other, the banter always flows. PLUS I get to indulge me love for music in poignant situations. Picture the scene. It’s a glorious day (in paradise). You’re on a boat with good good people. You have some of your favourite music in your ears. (this is the clincher) and you are lying on the very front of the bow of the boat. BLISS. There were many moments over these two days where I was struck by an overwhelming sense of euphoria. It’s an ALMOST indescribably perfect ethereal feeling that I have felt few times before and I doubt I will feel with such strength in the future. It takes me back to mantra I used to utter to myself a few years back when I was going through a tough time. FIND SOMETHING. GET INVOLVED. I still live and die by that. It can be something you connect deeply and emotionally with or something that fuels the fire in your belly but whatever it is and wherever it takes you, make sure have SOMETHING that fulfils your passions and get involved in it. Right now, I have travel, diving, adventure, my beard and the wonderful people I have left behind as well as those I am now surrounded by.  I am no genius, but please. Think on it. Feed your passions. They are important.

As I have already mentioned, music is a hugely significant part of my life. Recently, the song Biko by Bloc Party has been a focus. The lyrics plead ”if I could eat you cancer I would” because “you’re not doing… this alone”. Somehow the track feels uplifting and empowering while being gently punctuated by heart-wrenchingly thought provoking sentiments.  Last year I lost two very dear people to cancer. They were both awesome. They each shared an adventurous spirit with a noble, chivalrous and kind outlook on life. They were great friends to me. I like to indulge myself while listening to this song, the memories it helps to conjure and the warmth they fill me with. Peter and Mo. You truly were an inspiration. You are missed but your spirits live on!!

Jamiroqui – Blue Skies (Flux pavilion remix) – this might be for the younger folk out there. It is exactly what is says in the title. It is the audio representation of blue skies. Y’know, that soaring, timeless and ageless sensation you get when you see that gorgeous spectrum of blue that the sky has the unique ability to show-off. Thanks sky. You rock.

I hope this finds you well. I hope you are winning in whatever it is you need to win at. Most importantly, those people in life you care about know that you care.

Until the next time good people, take it easy.

Much love, Ads (beardface)