Dauin, I'm cheating on you... with Malapascua

Sometimes in life you look elsewhere for something new. It can manifest as food envy like when someone orders something that you wish you had. It can be fish envy where another group of divers saw a juvenile, pigmy, flambouyant manta fish (they don't REALLY exist). OR. It can be purely to experience something new and different. I am not for a minute condoning cheating, adultery or cuckoldry BUT I am suggestively suggesting you try new things. It is with this in mind that i metaphorically jumped on Our Old Friend's back on his way to his alma mater - Malapascua Island, Philippines.

"Lads on tour - the journey of awesomeness"

Forget Frodo, the Ring and Mordor we had a hefty 12-18 hour journey ahead - there was DEFINITELY some elasticity in the timings of things. One simply does not GO to Malapascua. We both knew it would be an interesting enterprise when it was a better idea for us to get out the pedi cab and walk for the first kilometre. We kinda missed our first bus but that turned out to be a blessing because we headed for a different ferry and THAT turned out to be much faster. A Ceres (bus) liner was waiting and we boarded to Cebu City - the Big Smoke. Let me explain that Ceres Liners are air-conditioned coaches driven by what I can only assume are trainee Filippino Rally Drivers although, in their defence, the faster they drive the shorter journey.

The Liquid - Aquamundo partnership continues

We arrived in Cebu, the land of buildings, roads, cars and hookers. We had already planned to do some gear shopping but when we found out that there was a TGI Friday's in the Ayala Mall we decided to stay for the night. It was a good choice. We visited AquaMundo who supply the Liquid Dive shop with most of their equipment and were greeted as old friends and treated exceptionally well. I cannot recommend them high enough for the customer service, their product quality, price and also the after-sale service. THANK YOU Joey and the team for your help.

Dona Marilyn - spooky huh

We drank and ate with gay abandon until we had to go home due to over filling. The next day was prefixed by a lunatic cab driver, another bus that we jumped on as it was leaving which is easier said than done with Our Old Friend's 30kg bag of (tech) dive gear and then suffixed by a joyful banker boat ride to Malapascua. It is all too easy to start shouting about white sand this and clear oceans that but for me, it is the closeness of the community here that has fueled the fire in my heart most.



I dived the Dona Marilyn wreck on my first full day and after two almost identical (in a good way) dives I can honestly say I have seen what a huge passeneger ferry looks like when it sinks. This particular ship sank in October 1988 during Typhoon Ruby in 130knot winds. It is slightly spooky and macabre to think that so many people sadly lost their lives in that spot. It was something I pondered while at 30metres. 

Hello my thresher sharky friend

Naturally a fella of my inquisitive nature cannot come to Malapascua and NOT go to see the thresher sharks so me and Our Kid decided to get absolutely obliterated and I ended staying up until 3:30am. This isn't that big of a deal until you realise that the thresher shark dives a Monad leave at 530am. So after one FULL hour's sleep, I was up and at 'em. I felt woefully bad but nothing a few dry heaves did not fix. Honestly, I was fairly underwhelmed. The sharks themselves were beautiful with their long ribbon tails and huge black inquisitive eyes - one of natures curious wonders. *ALERT - SOAP BOX MOMENT*. I don’t understand why everyone is kicking up such a stink over the Oslob whale sharks and the perceived detrimental effect on the migratory pattern while the circus at Monad is going on without any fuss. It was horrible seeing that many incompetent divers ripping up and breaking so much coral. It broke my heart a little bit and tainted the whole experience for me. I would love to encourage you to see the sharks (here)but I genuinely would rather the the fewer people diving there the better. Rant over-ish. I am sorry if i have trodden on anyone's toes or upset anyone BUT, like I said, I am disappointed (said in a Dad voice) that this continues to go on with no backlash. I'd happily hear your thoughts though.


I expect that most evening with continue along the lines of drinking at the Craic House - the Evolution bar - or going visiting and inevitably drinking Filippino style. Drinking Filippino style?What's all this jazz about? In the words of Destiny's Child, I don't think you're ready for this jelly... Basically, everyone sits round, and you all drink for one glass in turn. There is a gunner who is responsible for replenishing the drinking utensil with whatever the communal drink is (usually Tanduay or Red Horse / Gold Eagle - strong beer) and it also the gunner is sets the resulting pace for the night. Usually the faster the pace the better. So much so that if you take too long to drink you are berated with quips along the lines of "are you growing a tree in that". My personal favourite is "a man's not a camel. DRINK". Filippinos like to drink. I like to drink. We are a match made in heaven. Sometimes a drunken match made in heaven... but as long as heaven is there then all is well. Right? 

THIS is a useful reminder. Thanks Cebu