HOME... (The UK)

Wow, so I made it home. It only took 56 hours of that most of it was spent in airports rather that in the air which I think is a novel way to travel BUT,sadly I do not think this trend will catch on. What do I have to report with regard to my international adventure? Well. In Bahrain, they have a big mac but instead of being made with beef patties they are made with chicken. I think they call it a Chicken Big Mac but I wouldn’t want to commit to that. It turns out that Bahrain was not all that warm either. In fact, despite it’s sandy almost lunar vistas indicated that it would be hilariously hot, the journey from the plane to the terminal was distinctly chilly. I was beginning to dread the Great British climate.

Another flight came and went and dispite my best attempts, I was not upgraded and was actually placed amongst a family of four children and their respective parents. Wooo. The young fella next to me decided that I would make a great foot stool during his deep and never ending slumber. Double wooo. Eventually I landed and was re-united with my family. Strangely, the only thing I craved was humus. This was provided in over-the-top abundance but I am not one to look a gift humus in the mouth although I was hit by my first pang of missing the home I called Liquid Dumaguete and Tim’s home made pita and humus.

Naturally I have been over fed and watered by EVERYONE. Picture this: mum’s homemade Moussaka, cheese board and chirstmas puddng cheese cake FOR BREAKFAST. It’s a tough life but someone has to live it. If you know me then you will know that that is not such a big problem. I don’t have much else to say apart from the skies in London despite being interjected by weird and wonderful buildings are usually grey and the temperature is cold. Much as I love this city and country I am itching to get back home. People seem less than happy and ONE of them now has my phone. Yep, my pockets were picked on my first day back. Now I have no means of listening to music which genuinely feels like loosing a limb¹. Thanks London. Thanks a LOT.

In my absence and to my surprise, it appears that life goes on in the Philippines. The thought that every single person this earth has their own life, thoughts and direction that carry on regardless of whether you are there or not still baffles me a little bit, if you also consider that there are many billions of people on this glorious planet then you are in serious danger of blowing my mind. Liquid life continues with a successful new intructor coming up through the ranks and therefore a humungous party and much celebration. I wish I was there for that. Congrats and well done fella. You deserve it and I am SURE you will make a superb instructor for many years to come. Secondly, a trip to the Suliman Islands to swim with Whale Sharks happened. I am not sure if you have seen all the photos BUT they look exceptional. I hope they are still there when I get back otherwise my many trips on the whaleways² at home with have to suffice. I have been promised by Gui and Alfred that it was one of the greatest moments of their lives. Liquid Dumaguete – where dreams come true. It’s got a certain ring to it huh?!

Until the next time my friends, I hope you are warm, comfortable and dry, surrounded by those who you wish to be surrounded by.

Take it easy,

Ads x

¹ Turns out my dad has insurance and I officially live with him so I now have a shiny new phone-based music device on its way (I hope). Thanks dad!!

2 I am so soo soooo sorry. That is a classic dad joke and I do not know where it came from but I hope it is not contagious.

Heading home (soon)

This week has been highglighted (for want of a better word) by the weather and if you want me to be more precise then I will specifiy the WIND in particular. If you imagine the scene, a glassy smooth ocean with the sun rising behind it and a gentle breeze cooling you to the perfect temperature then you will be and as I was imagining Liquid (I think that is the simplest abbreviation) on a normal day. HOWEVER, I had not factored in Beelzebub nor Aeolus. They are two fellas / mythic beings who should NOT be messed with. Naturally though, we had Roy, Vince, Julias and the rest of the boat crew on our side so we braved the high seas and went on an adventure to Apo. This is usually a fairly simple undertaking. The return leg was a lot of fun and most enjoyable with our implicit confidence in the crew. The seas were ROUGH with 10-15 foot swells. Having said all this, calm has been resorted to our little corner of the Philippines now and we are once again bless with glassy seas and sunny skies (MOST of the time).

Thursday 24^th November saw an away day for most of the staff and guests to the Drill Shack for a Thanksgiving meal. I am not American so you could argue that I am jumping on a bandwagon but if you ask me bandwagons are there to be jumped on sometimes. ESPECIALLY those that encourage togetherness, community and socialising with friends and family, close and new. Plus, I am pretty thankful in general at the moment AND I LOVE turkey. I consider this to be a warm up for Christmas – another time I love. I have pretty much finished my international christmas shopping so I hope (some) of you folks are looking forward to Filippino/Malaysian themed gifts!

I have recently made a new friend. She has gorgeous, glossy blond hair, blue blue eyes, a wonderful smile and she LOVES to use her tongue (bear with me)... She likes nothing more than lazy Sundays, long walks along the beach,swimming in the ocean and a drink at the end of the day. Her name is Polka and she is a golden retriever. Solymar and I WITH Polka’s assistance have been searching for treasure up and down the beach when we take her for walks. If we are lucky we have Captain Kai along for assistance. He is particularly good at spotting boats and the moon. He is pivotal to our success.

John and Ro left and to be honest, they were wonderful people and definitely brightened up the place with their laid back and cheerful demeanour. Don’t misinterpret that by imagining that Liquid is not still the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow BUT they helped us turn the joy-factor up to eleven. We have had a series of guests coming and going and we are currently fairly quiet with a fair few arrivals on the horizon.

I think I should probably start talking about diving a little bit seeing as that is pretty much my favourite passtime these days. Gui (with my assistance) has been certifying divers left right and centre and with James being the latest addition to the PADI Family (yuck, I can’t believe I just wrote that) having passed his open water and I now moving on to his Advanced Open Water cert. Chapel dive site at Apo? Yeah, I think so. Interestingly enough, Gui and I  were very lucky on our last trip to Apo because we (and by we I mean the boat crew) spotted a juvenile whale shark. I have heard rumors and stories of these beautiful creatures but I was not even close to being prepared for how majestic they really are. I named this one Andrew (in my head), he was roughly 4-5metres long and was quite content hanging out next to the boat while we gasped and excitedly chattered BUT for inexplicable reasons neither Gui nor I thought to grab our snorkels and jump in. This is something we mutually berate ourselves about often.

As for me, I have passed my first DiveMaster exams with 100%, yeah, I know, I am awesome and having assissted in enough courses to appease the criteria I am ploughing through my course while still managing to be in no particular hurry. I am heading home for a few weeks but fear not, not only will I continuing furninshing your internets with my thoughts BUT I will be returning triumphantly in January to finish off my certification and continue to make rainbow coloured waves in the PADI community. (Yeah, I know I look like a walnut).

Before I leave there is the important detail of Keith aka Lolo and his imminent depature. Being the gentleman that he is, and I use the term loosely, he has kindly bought a lechon for family, friends, guests and staff. I am hilariously excited about this. Filippinos know how to cook a whole pig. I will tell you in GREAT detail about it once it has happened. On a serious note, I will miss him for many reasons and the place will not be the same without him BUT is wonderful wife Claire arrives at the end of Jan so I look forward to that with excitement.

YEAH. That's numerical bullet points

I write this while getting my hair plaited. I needed to get that off my chest. I’ve said it now and there is nothing I can do to take it back. Judge me if you dare. It has been a fun filled and busy week here at Liquid headquarters. I’ll give you a quick lowdown.

1.       The DiveMaster Village has started to come together

2.       Sasha and I have passed our Rescue Diver course

3.       Stephen and Peggy left BUT now we have John and Ro (not to mention a hoard of French botanists plus another couple due tomorrow.

4.       Keith aka Lolo and Claire’s house has been completed and Keith spent a wonderfully cool first night sleeping there last night

5.       I have bought a dive computer

I’ll break these down for you as to why they are interesting/important/noteworthy. For Reference’s sake, I shall write a small directive relating to its numerical co-hort above. Interesting? I don’t care whether YOU think it is, I LOVE this kind of geekery.

1.       We/ I am very lucky to be one of the longterm “guests” here. I am one of three at the moment. There is Gui, the classically handsome French, butter loving Instructor; myself – hairy, happy, heart-makingly happy and our old friend – superbly knowledgeable, hard working and a good partner for propping up the bar. As an aside note, I personally use the term heart-makingly as the antithesis of hear-breakingly. If you have a better idea, please get in touch. WE are going to inhabiting the DiveMaster Village which will give us a room each with a communal self-contained eating, sleeping, sitting, washing, cooking, talking, eating and SLEEPING area. Yeah, I meant to put eat and sleeping in twice for added contextual importance.

2.       If you were paying attention you would have noticed that last week I wrote “Saniya and I successfully passed our Rescue diver exams”. There were a series of moments where we both thought we had finished the course (having being told so – a simple mistake to make), only to hear an “Oh no! There is a non-responsive diver in the water” or “where’s Gui? I saw him out in the reef about 100 metres that way” only to find him/them at the bottom being non-breathing divers in trouble. S’ok, we saved them. It took a fair amount of convincing to assure us that we HAD finished. We, are now RESUCE DIVERs ready to respond to your rescuing needs which being well accomplished and responsible rescue divers means we will pro-active prevent as many problems arising as possible.

3.       John and Ro are here with their limitless enthusiasm, smiling demeanour and GREAT diving videos. Four dives a day for the next week then? Don’t mind if I do! THANKS. The French ‘botanists’ arrive tomorrow so Gui will be able to happily talk to them in his mother tongue without fear of reprisal or the micky being taken. The interesting question is whether they like to dive? We have been informed that they like plants and nudibranchs. The trickier part is how they relate. The running thought is that PERHAPS they will like coral as well. I think they will especially because the coral here is magnificent and has left most of our past guests speechless. I look forward to their arrival.

4.       Keith’s house which is the lower floor if the grandparents’ villa has been completed. In the process, Tim and I were ‘asked’ to build Kieth a kitchen cabinet. When I say asked, I mean cajoled. When I say cajoled I mean told that it was part of my DiveMaster training. Little did they know that I quite enjoy building stuff so I was happy. Watch how it went here!

5.       A dive computer. Is this necessary? Isn’t it just big boys toys? To be honest. No. It is a vital piece of diving equipment. Yeah, I know, electronic tape measures and USB laser pointers are also vital but in this case it serves a heavily practical purpose. I’m not sure if you knew but as you dive (deeper) an increasing amount of nitrogen is absorbed into the blood, so computers are there to make sure thatyou stay within the conservative limits by tracking your depth and time and reducing the possibility of decompression illnesses... Decompression illness is NOT GOOD. Do stuf that stops it being a possibility. PLUS, if all goes to plan, then I will be doing this for a fair while with (good) people being my resonpnsibility so it would be negligent NOT to have a computer to help plan my dives with them. If you are interested, I am going to get a Suunto Vyper.

I hope that all is well whereever you may be. I think that if you’re feeling a bit down on your luck or in need of a life-is-good boost then, honestly, you should start considering a visit to these shores. Not only would yo ube welcomed by a big smile, cold beer a-plenty and wonderful food, you will also have to deal with sun, sand, and the sound of the ocean waves. G’waan. Do it. I promise you won’t regret it

S'ok. I'll Rescue you!

My moments of introspection are few and far between and are often dispelled my even stronger feelings of content. It dawned on me the other day that I am coming up to six months of being away and that is something that surprised me. Six. Months. Much like how my GCSEs felt like an eternity away when I was twelve years old, this is a milestone that I never imagined I would reach with such consistent and persistent happiness.

I can’t remember who it was that I was talking to the other day, but it is the people I have met along the way who have made this trip so wonderful for me. They range from the ever changing family that I have here a Liquid (yeah I know I go on about the ‘family’ here a lot but it is uniquely special. Deal with it. Jealousy is not a virtue!!) through to Aran, the ANCIENT Iban head man from Murudi, Sarawak. Aran and I did not share a common language in that he only spoke Iban and I spoke a smattering of English and even less Bahasa Melayu (Malaysian). I think the only way you could find out his age would be to cut him in half and count the rings although I’d estimate him to be between two and three hundred years old. This is a picture of Aran not me.

This week has been filled with rescue, rescue, rescue and much as I anticipated I have LOVED every second PLUS, it has been a fun physical and mental challenge. Gui has been an excellent instructor with a great deal of insightful and useful input from Tim so it is with this in mind that I stupidly highly recommend doing your Rescue Diver certification... HERE. We have covered everything from the physiology of diving related accidents through to the psychology of being rescued interspersed with various people drowning or going missing in a variety of wonderfully imaginative places. Thanks to all those who took part in jangling my nerves for this week... including JUST before dinner. SEE! Saniya still finding time to smile for the camera!

Today, as I sit here and write this, I am still basking in the glow of two things. The first is not really worth of basking but I am basking by proxy. Saniya and I successfully passed our Rescue diver exams, me with 47 out of 50 and Saniya, a native Russian speaking girl from Kazakhstan, passed with 48 out of 50. Will I ever live this down? No. Oh AND the second. I found somewhere in town that sold HUNGARIAN sausage with fried egg and rice for breakfast. Not only was it an actual sausage with meat in it BUT it tasted like it had been made with Hungarian influeces. The meat content statement relates to the Philippine love of flourescent ‘hot dogs’ often served with marshmallows. My Hungarian sausage commen relates to my Greco-Hungarian origins. Dad. It tasted good.

So. Marshmallows with hot dogs. Yeah. Seriously. It’s a Phillipino birthday treat. It was Jaako and Saniya’s birthday so we celebrated with a rescue scenario, meat with sweets and barbequed fish. Drinks were drunk. Candles were blown out and merriment was made. It, as usual, was a great evening and the food was  TREAT. Peddy and Ginalyn did themselves proud.

The kids have been hanging around a lot which has been a lot of fun BUT I do not think I am ready QUITE yet for little ones of my own. Don’t worry world, I will one day but I am fairy sure you will know all about it. For now, sunny days with copious amounts of swimming, eating and drinking are just the ticket. I will happily go swimming with Solymar and watch cartoons with Kai Kai any time they want. If this was an equation for life then the solution would be Life is good. Tatty bye now

Disclaimer: The cheesiness of that final paragraph is not my fault. I think the sun must be getting to me or something else that absolves me from blame.

Four weeks in NOW WITH PUMPKINS

Alright alright alright!! I know it’s late. I know I said I would write every Wednesday but I think you were getting complacent and so I wanted to put a bit of pizzazz back into our relationship. Y’know, keep it interesting. I can only assume from your evil death-stare-eyes that my intentions have been misguided. I am aware of my mistake but I am not sorry. I not a machine I have feelings and needs too y’know.

It is with stagnation in mind that I ponder WHY it is that I have delay/paused/procrastinated this week.(As an aside, I am the overlord of literary segues). It came to me as I woke up this morning. I THINK I am becoming accustomed to my life. Worryingly, I am on the verge of being de-sensitised to this glorious place which is slowly giving me an idyllic life beyond my comprehension.

The last week has been highlighted by comings and goings of Jaakko and Petro, Emy, Ryan, Reed and Kirsten with their adorable children, Duncan and Amanda left us but NOT before a pumpkin carving with Solymar and Kai Kai. I have never really made jack o’lanterns. So two things happened that night. I carved my first pumpkin AND learned that they are called jack o’lanterns. This place just keeps on giving. It was a great night for all.

On top of all this an old friend of Tim and Zoe’s and an Exotic veteran. He will definitely add a lot to this place I call home. We have already been on a few good dives, I have been given a few great bits of advice and shared many laughs. Between he, Gui and I think life here is only getting better.

Saniya and I started our Rescue Diver course on Friday. Much studying has already happened (see below).

 I KNOW I am going to like this. I was lucky enough to take part in a fairly serious Jungle and wilderness first aid course earlier this summer and I LOVED that... apart from being woken up at 4am for a rescue scenario where the victim had ruptured their spleen. Turns out you can’t fix that in the jungle. I wonder what will be thrown at us next. So far you should be relieved to know that we rescue the dinosaurs.

I KNOW I am wearing a towel on my head so that I concentrate on the bearing and Saniya uses her eyes for looking. Turns out that that is important.

My excitement seldom subsides. Day to day, I find myself more and more content. The weather does not seem to be getting worse despite Keith’s prophecies of doom about the weather and they say it is going to turn cooler. Happiness is currently spelled L-i-q-u-i-d D-u-m-a-g-u-e-t-e

Until the next time wonderful people and in the mean time when are you coming to see us!!

Week 3.SMASH.

Well, well, well, look what we’ve got here. You just can’t get enough can you! For shame. I, on the other hand, am open with my voyeuristic love for too much never being enough. Today is another glorious day on the island of Negros in the Philippines. Some of my friends still think I am in Malaysia or even Indonesia. Just to help everyone out, I am training to be a DiveMaster. It’s like being in the jungle but it’s underwater.

If I’m honest there are many parallels between my life as a Bearded JungleMan and my currently life as a Bearded DiveHero (my words not anyone else’s). I wake up every morning earlyish, make sure that my beard and hair look good, they do. Do I wear a vest today? What colour shorts? Am I going to be diving or swimming in the hour or two? All tricky things to consider. It can get chilly out here. It dropped below 27^oC the other day. Next decision is footwear - flip-flops not jungle boots – do I wear my cheap workhorse pair or the fancier pair that I “save for best?” I still give a respectful nod to my boots which faithfully stand guard outside the front door being aired for the rest of their life. I eat my apple and then head to the office. Admittedly I had no choice of clothes to choose from or any such luxury as to care about the weather OR the chance to eat apples or have a shower or drinkable water OR a bed to ponder such existential conundrums in the jungle but I still hold firm that my current life is still similar to my recent incarnation.

So, I’ve made it out of bed, had a HOT shower, brushed my teeth taken my vitamin supplements and walked all the way to the lodge where I am greeted by friendly, happy faces – both staff (Anne or Lovely (that's her ACTUAL name) and guests – usually checking emails, trying to book flights or looking at their next destinations. Breakfast ranges from a bowl of good old fashioned Kellogg’s cornflakes with milk to The Whole Shebang (egg, bacon, grilled tomato, toast, fruit salad and a glass of tang). The first dive leaves approximately 8:30 depending on where you are going and how many dives are taking place that day.

 I leave my key with Nez who runs the dive shop whilst being possibly the sweetest, kindest and smiliest girl IN THE WORLD. Let’s pretend we are going to Apo Island which is one of the world’s best dive sites. Ginalyn would have packed our lunch of rice and fish or a sandwich on homemade bread and we would all head to Putt-Putt the beach launch boat that takes us to Sundancer. Once we are in the vicinity of the water we are placed safely in the hands of Captain Vince, Roy ‘the tank’, Julius and sometimes Alan who is tankish in build but fridge-like in stature. Between these guys you are both safe and CONSTANTLY amused/confused. As Sundancer ploughs through any waves that may exists, the divers chatter excitedly about the various flamboyant or ghost or flamboyant ghost species of fish they might see or perhaps they glaze poetically out to sea. Once we have reached our dive site and Vince has deciphered a multitude of conflicting hand signals given by Julius and Alfred (Roy just sits quietly atop the prow of the boat waiting to hooking the mooring line). Alfred – Liquid’s current DiveMaster will give us the briefing which I would be willing to bet mentions a “sandy sloop” (slope). Alfred likes sandy sloops. We will dive. Everyone has their own ways of enjoying their dives. For example, I like to be upside down or hovering while hardly breathing, Dan likes to spot fish and take photos where possible, Alfred plays on the sandy sloops somehow finding things that barely exist, yet when we re-surface everyone bubbles with the same enthusiasm. I love that. There is also a touch of international and slightly indecipherable banter. I love that as well.

We will return TRIUMPHANTLY back to the resort and fill Keith in with all the fish we have seen (he very interested). Once all equipment is rinsed and humans de-salinated in my favourite shower I head to the lodge/bar/restaurant/chill out area where San Miguel Light is served by the crate load.

 Just as a heads-up to my weight conscious friends, San Miguel Light is not light on alcohol but calories, just 150kcal per bottle. AMAZING. Couple that with happy hour and you have the makings of (another) wonderful evening at Liquid Dumaguete. It is around this time that I’ll have my daily conflab with Keith. This is one of my favourite parts of the day during which I am assured all is well with Ian down at the Drill Shack – a bar along the beach from us owned and run by Ian a former oil driller. How can this joyous day get any better I hear you ask? I wondered the same thing when I first arrived. It does not include narcotics, hookers or guns. Ricky and Peddy, the chef and his assistant respectively, conjure up different, tasty and filling meals for lunch and dinner EVERY DAY. I have not eaten the same thing twice yet. One of my personal favorite parts about dinner is that we eat as a big family. All round one table. All chattering about everything from fish seen that day to Blackadder. Who could be homesick with a surrogate family like this?

Slowly but surely people head to bed or hang out and watch whatever movie is playing that night. I usually retire around nine sometimes via the beach where I sit, watch the (shooting) stars and listen to some music using my Wild Spice Pingles can amplifier. You think this is some crazy novelty electronic product however you would be more wrong than banana in Spaghetti Bolognese. If you have a electronic device with a small tinny speaker, merely put it speaker end down into a pringles can and you have a Bose sound system. If in the jungle use a LARGE tin of tuna (after you have burnt the residual food and moisture out of it... and let it cool). Try it. Unless you have an iPod dock. That probably works better.

As usual my friends, my tan is getting darker and I am awaiting your visit with excitement. Make it happen people. This place has to be seen, lived and breathed to be believed.

Much love,

Ads

Advanced Open Water superhero

Week two has been and gone. Time appears to be accelerating. There must be a few holes in the space/time continuum AND the flux capacitor is on the blink. THIS could get messy. If I start writing about future events using the past tense then contact Marty McFly, the Time Bandits and Dr Who...

I have started writing this whilst atop my perch as barkeep for the evening. For those of you who have known me a little while, will know that this can go one of a few ways: either EVERYONE will get hammered or just I will get hammered. I will attempt to keep this civil... Turns out, I was remarkably sober for most of the evening and Dan passed his snorkel test = a little-lot bit tipsy. Check out the photos on Facebook. I especially like the before and after.

I have been learning much from Yosha – Ukrainian filmmaker and zen-like diving instructor extraordinaire. We discuss the finer points of breathing and buoyancy on a regular basis. Gio, our resident Frenchman and “booteure” enthusiast has arrived. Dan is now DiveMaster Dan and Saniya and I are slowly slowly becoming better and better, happier and happier divers.

With regard to diving progress, I am now an ADVANCED diver with a few more dives under my belt. I will reiterate my closing words for my last missive – breath slow and take it easy. THIS is something I gently whisper to myself during most of my times underwater. I am fairly sure, and forgive my lack of jargon, there is a LOT but I think I might be becoming a dive-hippy type. I cannot stress enough how magical the underwater world is. I might not yet know all the varieties of nudibranchs or the difference between an ornate and a ghost pipefish (yet) so I spend most of my time underwater playing whilst concentrating on breathing air NOT water.

Playing mainly involves trying to see how little air I can use over the period of a dive. This basically translates to varying breathing between shallow but slightly faster cycles or SLLLOOOOWWWW deep breaths. Something I had not considered in the real world was how breathing or a breath affects you while underwater. Turns out if you breath IN you float more and if you breath out you sink. (ish).

Tatiana and Slav took this photo of me while diving the wall at Kanu Panan. I love it. More games. Wondering around on my back although I prefer to hover upside down - feet up head down – often imagining I am a cameraman for the BBC natural department. It might be a little bit vain but I am very curious what I look like underwater. I am not know for being graceful so maybe, just maybe I am a tiny bit elegant underwater. Hopefully more photos of my underwater exploits to come.

Have you ever pondered how you quantify making it? Gold plated Rolls Royce or mink lined underwear? How about a heated toilet? Somehow my life now has a fully functioning headed toilet... I already had the mink underwear. Lickie D’s (still trying to see if there is a way of shortening Liquid Dumaguete) main water source is a natural, volcanic hot spring so all the water is hot. No, sorry. It is H.O.T. So whenever the need takes you, you sit atop a pre-warmed throne. Does life get much better?

There is also the enigma commonly referred to as Keith or Lolo. This is a gentleman (I use the term loosely) who appears to have lived at least three lifetimes worth of anecdotes. Never short of a word. Always ready with an opinion, rarely without a smile. I have and will continue to look forward to many sundowners while highlighting the world’s problems. We tend to highlight but not fix the problems.

Export quality semi dried mango. This stuff is DEElightful. You can imagine the rest especially if eaten with hot and spicy peanuts.

Having spent the last few months in the jungle and remote rural areas, I have become accustomed to the morning call from the cockerel. I was not mentally prepared for the alarm-cow. I can only imagine that there is a bovine prankster who assumes it is HILARIOUS to come passed my home and MOO very loudly at around 6am. Ok, I admit that I should be awake by then but I DO NOT need a cow to tell me so although I like the quirkiness.

The sun has risen and set 13/14 times since I first arrived here. With every day that passes I feel happier, stronger and more excitable about life. I am surrounded by a brilliantly eclectic group of people and continually engulfed by nature’s beauty both above and below the surface. To be training to make this a profession on top of all that? C’moooon. I am probably one of the luckiest people alive at the moment.

Until the next time people. Remember, upside down is the new right way up!

Love,

Ads

KAPPOWWWW. I have arrived at Liquid Dumaguete. Not in a fanfare or to a 21 gun salute, but in the only way I know best – sweaty, a little bit tired, massive bag on my shoulder (I had put my rucksack inside a larger dry bag to enhance its capacity) and a HUGE/excited smile on my face.

Hurdle #1 was easily overcome seeing as Mr Liquid Dumaguete aka Tim was at the airport in Dumaguete to pick me up. The best part for me was he had a board with my name on it (check out the photo!) so as to heighten our likelihood of recognising each other. I have never had that privilege before so things were already looking good and it was irrelevant that I was the only bearded white guy on the flight.

I kid you not. I feel like I have landed in paradise. I had the news broken to me that the staff quarters had not been built yet and so I would have to sleep in one of the beach front bungalows. Tough life for some! I am not showing off, but have a look at my view! I genuinely thought that views/houses/situations like this only existed in dreams and holiday brochures. From my personal experience, holiday brochures are as true to life as Lord of the Rings.

Who am I? Why am I invading your screen? How did I end up here? How do I get my hair to look THIS good? All questions I will answer in good time. We, no doubt will become old friends who regale our grandchildren with stories of restraining orders against each other and bar fights due to disagreements on the principles of modern art but for now, here are the basics. My name is Adam WonderBear Detre and I am working at Liquid Dumaguete towards my PADI DiveMaster qualification. So I do have some purpose to my life. I have spent the last four months training, living, and working in the jungles of Sarawak in Malaysian Borneo as part of a working-out-what-I-want-to-do-with-my-life journey’. I am not a fan of the modern use of the word journey. It is horrendously pretentious and horribly faux-liberal. Before this recent incarnation, I worked in a political communications company where I met a good man named Gav. It was a balmy sunny evening in early April, in the pub, after a few drinks that we started talking about my trip and he mentioned how his best mate Zoe was opening a diving resort in the Philippines. I emailed her that night. The rest is history.

Let me paint you a picture. You drive through Dumaguete towards Dauin on the island of Negros along the coastal road. The island is full of life and colour with breathtaking backdrops in every directions. The people are laid back and friendly with smiles being flung about with gay abandon. 20 minutes later and you turn off towards Liquid Dumaguete. To call this turn-off a road would be EXTREMELY generous but fortunately ‘The Lobster’ (the LD dive jeep) is well equipped. The hallowed gates appear and we turn in. BAM. You are hit by serenity, happiness and warmth – emotional and physical. You/I have arrived. I was gently ushered up to the bar/restaurant which is COMPLETELY open with view out towards the ocean. I mentioned the beautiful backdrops but they have NOTHING on the soundtrack to Liquid D (I am still trying to work out how to shorten the name). The ocean is the best piece of nature’s music that I have listened to. There are lovely people bustling around, it is nigh IMPOSSIBLE to carry anything for yourself without one of the many capable and friendly staff taking it off at a gallop to your destination. I’ll stop gushing now. In a nutshell, this place is heavenly. I feel very lucky.

Within a few hours I was in the pool with SCUBA gear on learning my first lessons. Day one, ended as with every other day with everyone eating dinner together. The food is perfect. A nice blend between slightly experimental (see spicy fruit and vegetable salad) and comforting (see breaded freshly caught fish and parsley boiled potatoes. Every day has been highlighted by heading INTO the water - twice at Publacion and Cars and twice OFF THE BOAT (checkout the pictures) at Masaplod North and Dauin South. By the end of day four I had six dives under my belt everything but my final test to do to pass my PADI Open Water Diver. I. FREAKIN’ LOVE IT.

I shan’t start to talk the big talk about diving (yet). At the moment, I am very aware of being a complete rookie. BUT, the oneness created by the peace and weightlessness coupled with the necessarily slow breathing is not replicable. I am happy and proud to be the first at the Liquid Dumaguete DiveMaster Academy.

Just as a bit of a side note. There is ONE song that I thing will forever remind me of this first life changing week. Have a listen to Is Love Enough – Michael Franti & Spearhead feat. Gentlemen.

As i sit here...

... I start to reflect. I left Malaysian Borneo.

I appreciate every traveller-type starts to wax lyrical about how all they need is their bag on their back and the simplicities that life offers when you are fortunate. I’m hopefully not going to do that. (As a rule with these mails, I don’t edit them so I a genuinely quite curious what gems I am going to spout).

*new paragraph*

I am content with my life as it is at the moment. I am surrounded by good people with, strong hearts and giving personalities. The sun is shining at the moment, it’s warm, having not had a hot shower in almost a month I now have perma-hot water from a natural hot spring. Talk about going from one extreme to the other! I haven’t changed my clothes properly for 2 weeks. My hair is matted. My beard is dull and lifeless. UNFORGIVEABLE. I have cuts, grazes and bruises all over my body (including a split above my eye gained from a flying can of beer in the dark. More about that later). All in all, each mark or blemish make me feel a little happier that I am outside constantly. I sleep outside often, I eat outside almost always and I walk somewhere to somewhere else daily. I think that is what I will miss. The mud, blood sweat and fears. There have been no tears, but I have to cross this bridge each day and I shit myself every time I do. I was not designed to carry me.

Last time I wrote I had been in the jungles on my own. For those of your who entered the ‘Back to the start’ 10Ringit mega-competition, the answer was Razorlight. Sadly no one won this time so the prize will be rolled over into a 20Ringit super-Saturday giveaway this time. I was camping here and there, walking there and here. Sometimes with a clue of where I was often with no idea whatsoever, just a firm belief that I would find where I was aiming for when I got there.

Eventually, with some luck and some judgement I placed myself on a path I knew well and stayed there a day and a half, I saw monkeys wander through the tree tops and heard gibbons VERY near. Then, I was woken by a human whistling. It was Rian, the local jungle hero and an old friend from my trip. Embarrassingly, I had slept until 12pm. I joined him and we walked on to RiverSnail camp. He had found an abandoned baby civet cat in one of the previous camps and had rescued him. I called him Derek. He was AWESOME. He liked sleeping in my sleeve. As you can imagine, I loved him greatly but sadly he died after 6 days in our car after a VERY cold night in the highlands.

I wandered back to Pa’ Umor with Rian and Jaun – his assistant. Jaun is 27, dark skinned, softly spoken, kind and strangely petite to look at BUT built like a tank. I don’t have a man-crush on him. I DON’T OK! We talked, drank, smoked, ate and pondered many of life’s intricacies at Rian’s house. Eventually Jimmy arrived and the pattern continued with an added healthy dose of Britishness. The inaugural night at ‘The VIP’ happened. This mystical fortress of wonderment was actually just Rian’s balcony, but it was about the size of a booth at a club and so we acted and treated it that way. ) We mainly drank Chapappé (CA), pronounced chup-app-pey. It’s a local spirit deemed to have medicinal properties. It’s quite nice really and generally drunk with strong dark tea as a mixer. LOVELY. At £3 a bottle it is the cheapest and most pleasant way to get obliterated.

On a walk home for Pa’ Umor, in the pitch black from the local (8km away). Jim thought it would be a good idea to throw me a beer, again, I stress in the pitch black... We didn’t have torches because we said we wouldn’t be out late. Famous last words. The can hit me HARD above the eye. I bled a bit. It has healed nicely now.

THEN, I met the hippy Canadian – Stu. This is a fella who is doing everything right. He is a carpenter, a self proclaimed ideas man and an all-round good guy. He has built, and I mean, literally he himself has built a few cabins in his pineapple farm with a plunge pool for washing. The water was gorgeously clear and invigoratingly cold. BLISS. I know I have used this word a few times but honestly I cannot think of a better word. Utopia could creep in there but I think that is a pretty big statement. There is only one other occasion back home that I regularly use the word bliss/blissful and that relates to my weekend holidays at Glastonbury. Anyway. Stu and Rose (his wife) were wonderful hosts and the growers of the FINEST pineapples in the area which is a fairly HUGE accolade considering Bario is famed for its pineapples. They are IN-CREDIBLE. I genuinely need another level of superlative. Out of this world? But. They are OF this world so maybe beyond comprehension. He also dries them and makes fruit roll from the pulp mixed with local cane sugar. Joyous.

I learned how to cook some cool things – river fern, curried tomato, fried rice, crispy fish soup and chilli fried tree grubs (surprisingly tasty) the list goes on.

It was with great amount of joy that Oz with his big potato head arrived a few days before I left. We drank CA with gay abandon, then gin with gayer abandon and THEN, headed to town. I say town, I mean to the only road in Bario with its two supermarkets/bars. We continued to drink and play pool. I am not sure if you remember but, I receive a (mortal) would in battle OR basically a can to the face from Jimmy depending on who I tell the story to. Upon talking Oz through this, while playing pool, we drunkenly decided that the stakes for the game should be that the looser has to punch Jimmy in the face. It made for an interesting game. Ultimately we played a few game, punch Jimmy a few times. As if this isn’t fun enough, Jimmy went on to lose a game to Oz. Jimmy is very good at pool. Having lost, he had to punch himself in the face. Bravo Jim. Good sport.

Since starting this email, I have moved on to the next place and new chapter in The Bearded Jungleman chronicles. I MIGHT have to update the name to Bearded Diving Jungleman. Give me some time on that one though.

I am now in Dauin on the island of Negros. I am stupidly happy/lucky/happy/lucky (repetition intended). I have my own beachfront bungalow with an en-suite and the afore mention perma-hot water. I am on cloud 9. Everyone here is friendly, laid back, happy and most importantly WONDERFUL. I think I will fit in well here. So far, I arrived with my humungor bag and a smile and now, I have a room with music, wireless(ish) and an even bigger smile. I am unfashionably content at the mo. I can’t wait for some of you to come see me here. (You really should. It. IS. AMAZING). Yeah, I know. I used bold. That’s how good it is. My breakfast was toasted muesli, fresh pineapple, banana, coconut, mango AND pear/apple WITH MILK. I mean real milk. I have not had mild since I left the UK.

I am sorry if this is a slightly schizophrenic missive. I have written in a few sittings. I hope it conveys how content I am and expresses my gratitude to the world. For me, it’s the thought that at any moment, we would be taken away from this world, a wrong move while driving and badly judged handhold when climbing and bang. You’re gone. Right now, I am living like I mean it and just to re-iterate, I am very thankful that life has enabled me to be able to do this. Thanks life. Thanks world.

Life is good.

Love (meant in its purest sense),

Ads

x

I learned three things today.

1 sour skittles in Malaysian are ACTUALLY amazingly sour. This is a good thing

2 Pedicures are ok

3 Faizal Tahir’s acoustic version of his song Hanyut is beautiful

Junglist stylings

This time I'll openly admit it. Ive been slack. Sorry it's taken so long...

Much has happened since I last wrote. Mostly good news but without the odd taint of bad to benchmark against, the good would be uninspiringly neutral. Incidentally while I think of it, one of the greatest quantifications of the jungle is it's neutrality. Freddy Spencer Chapman, one of the forebearers of jungle warfare, once said "the jungle is neutral" it will give you back what you put in. I have pondered this. I initially took a dislike to it's faux Buddhist simplicity, however, having tested it (gently - because the jungle is bigger than me) I agree. Why this tangent? I write this in the pitch black. In my hammock. In the jungle. On my own. I meet a friend here tomorrow morning but I wanted to see how I'd handle the solitary coexistence with nature/ jungle/ leeches... Mud. I've enjoyed myself. I bought MORE than enough food and kit and LOVED the peace and testing my skills BUT I am looking forward to seeing my friend again. It's the start of rainy season which is wet and remarkably cold actually! I'm in a fleece and trousers in my sleeping bag.

As usual I digress. I liked the tangent I built out of the neutrality though. Commendable no? Glad you liked it too!

So we circumnavigated Mount Kinabalu. It was fun, beautiful, tiring with a whole bunch of other superlatives thrown in too.

We end up back in KK (Kota Kinabalu) and readied ourselves for desert island, beachfront living. A 20minute boat ride later and we were on the island of Mamutik. Gorgeous warm blue seas. Pure white sand. Heavenly. Hold on. 13RM for a beer. Oh god WHY! We found a secluded cove on the Western side of the island where I watched the sun set from my hammock - a definite highlight of the trip for me. Wake up and head to the beach. Stayed there all day frolicking every-which way you could imagine. Strangely this was not satiating my and two of the other fellas desires so we headed back to the mainland (after what can only be described as the worst camp cooked meal of the trip) after 2days. I guess the lure of cheap(er) beer, proper bed with air-con and real food with vegetables and actual ingredients was too much. It resulted in one of the greatest 'lad' weeks I've had in YEARS. Plus the benefit of reinforcing two wonderful friendships. Tom. Mike. The Wolfpack. We repeatedly destroyed The Loft - a shitty bar and then 'skanked' all over Bed (the nightclub not the sleeping apparatus). I've repeatedly pondered whether Bed is a good name for a club or not. "we're going to Bed, do you want to come..." you decide. On one of these forays Mike and I ended up in a random suburb at a random club. With Tidak Ada Wang (Malay for no money). We had to barter a lift off some lovely guys on the back of their scooters. It. Was. Awesome. Lovely and airy in the groin region.

KK treated us well. It's apparently the culinary capital of Borneo. It truly is. Roast salmon with truffle linguini. Don't mind if I do. Sushi? What? 8 different fish, caught that morning? Yeah go on. Chicken satay in abundance. Alright but you're spoiling me. Whole crab in right tangy barbecue sauce? Fuck YEAH. I almost choked when they put that in front of me. I'll stop. That world is far away now.

Sadly KK spelled the end of the course. Tommy was first to go after he'd got his tattoo that he'd been thinking about for a few years. I was very sad to see him go. We shared some brilliant chats, banted some of the world's finest banter and talked about music a lot. A truly great man. Jimmy and I left next and did so under the cloak of darkness. I'm not one for good byes. I love most of the people I spent this time with but I do not want to put a cap on it. I'll see some of them again so I'm not too fussed about saying good bye.

Jim and I Went to Miri. Drink happened. Oz was in attendance. Hilarity was served with gay abandon. Miri was both relaxing and frantic. Jim confidently cocked a leg to fart and fully shat himself in a restaurant. I stayed up for 48hours for no reason but I did get to watch the sun rise from the roof of our building. Now I'm back in Bario in the Kelabit Highlands. I am happiest here. This, by no coincidence brings me 'back to the start' of this mail. 10RM to the first person who gets the musical reference.

I THINK I just shit myself OR it was a very wet fart. I've got to go and investigate. Think of me with your 3ply quilted loo roll and hot showers... I'm going in

Love you longtime

Ads x

PS. Turns out I didn't!! WOOOO

My Bungai Terung

 

Ask me a few years ago whether i'd ever get a tattoo and it would be a unanimous NO.

Then a long and winding series of events happened and I got my first on my back. (Not many people know I have it to be honest.) it's deeply personal and means a lot to me.

So. While here in Borneo, I wasn't searching to get another but the Bungai Terung seemed to fit the criteria. Personally, I did not know there were a set of criteria to be filled.

The Bunga Terung, which translates to the eggplant flower, is the first tattoo a Borneo male would receive. The Bunga Terung is a coming of age tattoo which marks the passage of a boy into manhood. The Bunga Terung has a spiral at the center of the eggplant flower the Tali Nyawa, which means the rope of life and is identical to the underside of a tadpole which symbolizes the beginning of a new life.

All the tattoos, following the eggplant flower, are like a diary. A young male would go out on his own to find knowledge and from each place he went to he would get one tattoo to mark not only where he is from but also where he has been. From each place the tattoos have different styles so the regional differences in his tattoos would tell the story of his journeys in life.

Naturally as always I wasn't going to get something that anyone else would have so I took the basic shape and adapted it. This is what you see before you... I love them. I'm very happy.

OK OK OK...

...I know I said I'd write or call you back. It not you it's me. I think you're great but I'm just not ready... Oh wait. This was supposed to be for someone else.

It truly has been a while and for that I'm sorry. Last time I wrote I wasn't feeling great BUT I powered through better and BADDER than ever before. We were staying in a place called Long Lellang. I'd been there before as you might have noticed from a previous missive and so returning there was not a chore in the least. I THINK it's the closest I've come to finding my personal paradise on earth so far. There is a wonderful warmth in the people there and an unbridled beauty in the surrounding jungles as well as the valley within which the settlement nestles. It was a while ago but I'll fill as much detail as possible.

We arrived to the warm(ish) greeting from the house keeper who I affectionately call ibou (Ibou is Malay for mother. I'm unsure of her real name) and her husband. He ended up giving me a crazy foot massage to help my chest. Not sure if it worked but that man has STRONG hands. Wowser. The new 'leader' fella proved a touch lack lustre but I'm not going to go into it. We wandered into the jungle for a few hours and found ourselves on a beautiful hillside camp. Unfortunately. It. Rained. HARD. Constantly. I hear you're having a touch of rain in blighty. God bless summer eh!

We went back to ibou and paradise because it was two other guys birthday - a 21st and a 27th. Amazing fun. Massive food. And these incrEDIBLE (you see what i did there) steamed (yeah steamed) pink cupcakes. I had arranged the food with 'bou and so we didn't go hungry. 2types of curry. A few types of greens, pineapple curry, twice fried eggs in barbecue sauce (surprisingly amazing) oh gosh and so much more.

Over the next 10/12 days we learned some advanced medical training ranging from understanding antibiotics and medicines to learning how to administer injections with syringes, suturing and intra-muscular treatment with canulas and a drip. We had to practice putting the canulas on eachother. It was AWESOME. Very exciting and proud moment. We have also used the time to finnish some more assessments which I'm still doing really well at so fingers crossed, I'll be back here next year.

It was with great sadness that i left Long Lellang but i intend to go back in September. We had a few stop over nights in Miri which resulted in the usual lunacy and culinary over indulgence (2 KFCs. 1 sitting.) as well as a little bit of shopping - mainly t-shirts, vests and shorts. My feet had taken a battering and so i chose to forgo footwear for a while... Turns out i was also to go commando for a few weeks as well.

The first evening was followed with beers... Etc. I was reasonably sober and then Mike came out at around midnight after a long Skype with his lady. We decided to move lication and met the burger vendor (naturally a good friend of mine by now) and he took us out to a club. Heavy heavy techno with Malaysians dancing on every surface available. PERFECT. Alas the lights went up and we were left venueless. Fear not, we befriended some nice Sikh boys who told us about another club which they then proceeded to drive us to. This place was a DIVE bar. Actually, it turns out it was a gay dive bar. I'd always assume that to be an oxymoron. The men seemed to like it when a statuesque Dutchman (mike) and a Bearish type (me) wondered in. So much so that they errr... Kept... Errr tweaking my penis (mum, dad it's ok, i promise this has only strengthened my heterosexual resolve""". You will still have grandchildren). I DID take a while for mike and I to realise that not only were these friendly men gay BUT the friendly women were actually friendly gay transexual men. I had to use the line: 'I have a penis, do you have a penis?' The answer was yes. I walked away quickly... Turns out we were in Borneo's ONLY transexual/gay club... I wish I'd worn underwear... And shoes. We got home at 5:30am and left the hostel at 7 to head to Mulu.

MULU is a national park famous for its pristine (apart from the tourist walkways) jungle, it's mountains and caves. We wandered round a show cave... It was cavenous. I may or may not have gotten completely naked in the world's largest 'passage'. Next day we did some adventure caving which involved climbing stuff but underground. The chambers were quite magical and inconceivably dark which wasn't a surprise to me but worth a mention. We headed back to Miri. Drank and made merry in Miri (hehe) in order to fly to Kota Kinabalu the next day. Until this point we had be gallivanting through Sarawak. Now we hit Sabah

KK is a developed, touristy, busy city. not a massive fan but it is the gateway to Sabah. The interesting part was that we had no idea of a plan so we were told a budget and we knew we had 8people and 12 days to fill so we each headed off or hit the phones or the Internet to get things together. After much dancing about, we are about to head off on a 5day cycle and trek around Mount Kinabalu. This trip has never been travelled without local guides or external support. SO we were lent bikes and a 4wd pickup was organised by a former TrekForcer but we needed spare parts and a whole lot else in the space of a day and a half. I managed to secure about 300RM of discounts for 1500RM of stuff. It felt like an episode of The Apprentice although there were fewer twats. Fewer. Not none. Just fewer. I will write again after the bike trip... Although we will be heading to a desert island for a week so I might not write until after then.

Sloppy man-love

Ads x

WOW. Wasn't expecting THAT

Wow... Wasn't expecting THAT to happen

I'm lying in my hammock in the middle of FUCKING (sorry mum) nowhere. We're 1/2 days shorts of having trekked from Bario to Long Lellang and it has been a bit of a roller coaster... Almost literally.

Firstly I'd like to highlight how much fun it is to use the double 'k' in trekked. Thanks.

The total journey is something like 50km which doesn't sound like a lot but if you imagine that this is up and down mountains in jungle, with 20kg bag on your back. Oysh. It's a toughie. Me being me though I thought I'd up the ante so I developed some kind of chest/throat virus on day two. This basically rendered me perma-breathless and dizzy. Not ideal I hear you say?! No. Not ideal. The poor medic - Dr Doug - who had only arrived two days earlier basically had to recommend me rest which had to be translated to 'walk 10hours a day up hill'. I send this message a little bit tentatively because I know you might worry but I want you to rest easy. I'm better now. By the time I'll have sent this, I'll be holed up in the presidential suite in our accommodation. I have to add here that if it weren't for the team of people I was surrounded by, I've got no doubt things would have been far worse. A group of individuals. No. STRANGERS but a few months ago showed more love, depth of character, guts and resilience this last week than I would have ever though possible. We are all, quite rightly, very proud of ourselves. 

(Since initially writing this I've arrived safely but I think my body has given up the goat a bit so I'm going to stay in bed for a little while. I reckon 2-3 days should do it! LIFE'S TOUGH EH!!)

Having been to Long Lellang before, Jim and I have organised for Deer Rendang to be waiting for us. This is what kept me going. That and imagining my beautiful SPACIOUS bed in blighty.

I've decided to book into a hotel for a night in Miri to pamper myself. I'm also thinking i might TRY and comeback for a few weeks at Christmas. IF you think you can handle it, I will be doing a non-stop tour of every eating establishment in the UK during this period. Any suggestions kindly welcomed.

This last week has been by FAR the toughest physical challenge I've ever faced. Has it whetted my appetite for more? Not sure. Ask me another time.

I know I've only been gone a short while BUT I think often how much I love(d) hugging/laughing with/talking to/being near you. I appreciate this is a group message but it's to a group of people I qualify my life by. I think my life is pretty spectacularly awesome so thank you for that.

Internet here is woeful otherwise I'd call. Also sorry if I haven't sent you a personal email please do not be upset with me, I will. One day. 

I don't want to make this part clichéd BUT, you're rarely out of my thoughts and those times in between, you are carried safely and warmly in my heart. 

Much love as always,

Ads x

=

Halfway... and not counting

Well well well. Here we are again.

I've officially passed the halfway point for my training and as usual I'm extremely happy and love the fact that this is my life edit now. As I mentioned at the end of my last missive, I could see myself doing this... For how long? Not sure but I think I picked the right company and the right course. Even if I don't end up with a proper job I will DEFINITELY love take you all out and about...

Since we spoke last, I've been to Long Lellang and lived like a jungle king. It was one of those weeks that will go down in my history as the cause for the MOST superlatives needed. I'll try and list a few but I'm sure I'll forget some. I ate: lizard (tasted like barbecue ribs), boar, python (which I helped gut and skin... Oh yeah it was 6 metres long and wider than my thigh), the snake fat, three types of deer, MANY fish, frogs and probably many flies and spiders in my sleep. I taught our housekeeper, yeah we had a house keeper, how to cook yakitori frog. She's going to teach me to cook deer rendang - a spicy fragrant Malaysian curry. CAN'T WAIT to cook it when I get back!! We hung out with a Penan fella. The Penan are the indigenous kings of the jungle. He gave us each a pisour which is a long handled knife. I spent the next day carving my parang handle with it. Looks AWESOME. We went frog hunting/wacking in the middle of the night. This basically involved looking for the reflection of the frogs' eyes and hitting them hard enough to knock them out... With a MASSIVE sword/knife. It was fun. I also reckon I've perfected the sumpit (blowpipe). I managed to shoot a small peach from 10metres away. Next up - using it for hunting. We taught in the school for the afternoon and basically spent a week laughing hard enough that I thought I COULD end up with a sixpack. I didn't.

Jim and I took care of business and paved the way for our fellow 'TELS' to trek there (only a 6 day walk) as well as securing a steady supply of pineapples and rice upon our arrival. We've hopefully organised a few projects for next year after meeting the headmen and village council so who knows, maybe I'll get to work on them?!?

We had to write it all up in 18 hours in Miri as well as risk assessments, casualty evacuation plans and a provisional logistics plan and budget which meant 16 hours in an Internet cafe... An hour was needed each day for KFC and Pizza Hut. Job done.

We have been in Pa'Umor for a week staying in a longhouse. It's like a Victorian terraced street but none of the houses have dividing walls. It's kinda nice with all the families together.

We've been learning river crossings and getting feedback from month one. It seems all is going well and I'm ticking all the right boxes which I'm properly chuffed to hear. ALTHOUGH I did fail my river crossing but, in the instructors words, 'you were making it look to easy so we fucked you over a little bit'. I lead a days work fixing a local bridge and got a high grade for that... I've passed everything else with high passes so having to re-take the river stuff isn't so bad.

I'm lying here listening to music writing this. We're packing for 8days in the jungle so I've no doubt that I'll have more to add as the days go by, assuming we've survived the trek in with 25-30kgs on our back. Oh. And belt kit night assessment which involves 2/3 nights out with nothing but out survival kit. I'll let you know (I hope).

So!! I've returned. Triumphantly. It's been an amazing few weeks. The march into what is now known as sun bear camp was dealt with. As usual, I sweated like a beast but enjoyed every step. It was wonderful to setup camp in maiden rainforrest. It's hard to put into words how elated I feel at the moment but basically having spend 5 nights in a gorgeous spot, setting it up for the next group, we wondered into a NEW part of the jungle with our belt kits to make our own homes. On. Our. Own. Most of you already know that I have been looking forward to this to MONTHS. It  lived up to my hopes. Pure bliss. I made a wonderful shelter that I think I will go back to at the end of the course. Set some traps (part of the assessment) and generally soaked in my surroundings. I had a wonderful spot next to a meander in the Pa Semarang river. It was cold at night especially as I didn't have a sleeping bag (they're pretty hard to make from leaves) so I kept a fire going each night next to my bed but all in all I slept really well. I'm back in Bario lying on a real live bed once again questioning how I've come to deserve such holistic joy and happiness in my life. I'm pretty sleepy now so I'm going to have a snooze before I cook boar for everyone later.

We're walking to Long LELLANG in two days and that should take around 6days/nights. I'm not sure when we'll have Internet again so until then...

You are seldom out of my thoughts. I wonder/ponder how you all are and love reading your words when they come.

I am sending lots of love, energy and happiness as always.

Ads x

PS my beard is getting very bushy!!!!

So far...

It's been roughly a month since I left and it's been pretty much non-stop but in a very good way - definitely appreciate the downtime a LOT!

It's hard to explain what we've been doing so I'll list what comes to mind and expand on the fun bits.

In Bario - an agglomeration of small villages set amongst the Kelabit highlands - we stayed in a beautiful (but basic) long house. This was our base. From there we would trek for 5hours with bags and kit and food to get to our jungle camps called Silverleaf and Hornbill.

Initially we learned basic jungle skills which mainly involved not being a twat. There was a fair amount of acclimatisation to do both physically and mentally. It's a strange place the jungle. I like it. A few of the others dont. You can't see the sky so you dont see sky it for a week at a time so some of the guys got a bit 'jungle feverish'. We played with our parangs (Malay machetes) learned to make fire, brushed up on navigation and got our heads round jungle chores. The hardest part is probably putting on soggy boxers each morning because you spend the day in your 'wet kit'. My wet kit started to smell like death no matter how often I washed it.  It didn't take long for conversation to revolve around shitting and eating but it's something we all enjoy!!

We had 2 solo nights where we wandered off with all our kit and some rations and were told to return the next day. The first night did not go very well. I spilt water over my fire so I ended up having a tin of cold sweetcorn for dinner. It's ok though. I like sweetcorn. The second attempt 10days later went much better but I ended up cooking my noodles in strawberry flavoured water because I'd added tang to it for the trek. Oh well. Sweet and savoury in one meal!

Since then we've been learned more and more detailed and intricate first aid. I properly loved it! We started to put the casualties into scenarios with one of us leading and the others acting as manpower for clearing evacuation paths, comms to the outside world, note taking, running around... Again. PROPERLY love this. Next we were assessed on this. Colin and Jade (our trainers and casualties) prepared us very well for this. The funny part was that ANY moment they would go missing. Day or night... We each had turns as the designated leader and had to use our resources to FIND the person, assess any danger, nominate a medic and generally manage the situation. I got a good pass which is the equivalent of a merit. Very happy with that.

Food in general is pretty shit. It's either rice/noodle based or porridge. The highlight was probably spaghetti with a creamy mushroom sauce. I say creamy mushroom. I mean tinned mushrooms with their juice with milk powder and condensed milk added. The trade-off is food is heavy but it tastes nice. Rationing is a tricky one to get right.

We're (Jim and I) are off to a place called Long Lellang now. To see if there are any projects that TrekForce could use for future groups. There is a fair amount of paper work to go with it so our downtime will be pretty busy... I'll let you know more when I know more!

All in all, I feel pretty lucky to be here. I get to utter/mumble/ponder my favourite phrase - LIFE IS GOOD - often. Some of the others are starting to use it too. I think I could see myself doing this for a year or two. Who knows.

I think of you all often. Miss you sometimes. Love you always.

Take it easy,

Ads x

Another Day Starts...

So my welsh is becoming gently more proficient (at least when it comes to map reading)!

It's been an amazing 10days so far - mainly highs. Last week we stayed in a shed type roundhouse/ger. It's was 60% waterproof and we were sleeping on wooden planks for beds but it was pretty magical. Went on a massive walk up a mountain in 60-80mph winds which we had to abort near the top. In hindsight it was fairly tricky (although id stress that i never felt in danger) I have to admit that it was great fun. Unfortunately one of the fellas - Jim - badly sprained his ankle on the way down so me and Jack (affectionately known as man-beast) carried him down. THAT was tough. We learned first aid and legal responsibilities and packed and repacked our kit all in between keeping a fire going constantly to cook on, dry out clothes near and generally huddle round. Possibly one of the greatest weeks of my life amongst 'strangers' - soon to be friends.

Week 2 has been backdropped by llanberis, the blue/White peris outdoor activities centre and ML (Mountain leader) training. Warm, dry, ALMOST plush. Our days have been punctuated by climbs into to surrounding mountains - Crympiau, Tryfam and Cwm Idwal. I can happily admit my fear of heights having gently conquered them in the gully 800metres up the side of Tryfam. Definitely a mind over matter moment. Will I do it again? Probably MANY times over the next few months. Yesterday we concentrated on rope work without a harness. PROPERLY cool. Always wanted to learned stuff like that and the South African harness is A-MAZING.

I've been very fortunate to be doing what I am doing fir the near future and I hope the people who helped me to get here know how important they are to me. I wake up every morning and after I've wiped the sleep from my eyes, I get to mutter my favourite phrase - LIFE IS GOOD. I find myself saying that a LOT. I feel very lucky to be able say that so often.

I'm nit going to be able to update often and to be honest, nor do I want to but I just thought I'd say hi...

Take it easy everyone.

Biglove and Bearhugs