Back into the (DiveMaster) thick of it

WOW, has it been that long already. You have to understand that I have no idea what day of the week it is. Sometimes, I wake up and I am scared that it is the day after tomorrow, then I realise/hope that someone would have come to check I was alive. (The photo? Yeah, that’s me… in the tropics… Yeah, I know. My hair looks great. THANKS!)

I have indulged myself over the last few missives mainly by spouting my internal flim-flam and mental wonderings but it appears that it was at the detriment of actual CONTENT. People like to read about actual things. So this time, I am making a conscious effort to have a focus. Let’s try talking about diving. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin.

My days are orientated by whether I am diving or not and if it I am assisting on a course. This week has been all about assisting for me and all the other DiverMaster Trainees (DMTs)… yeah, I know, there are more of us now. There is Eva who was here when I arrived back. From what I have seen and been told, she can hold her own in the bar and definitely in the ocean. Suzi/Suzanne loved being in the water and no matter what time of day, I turn around and she is in the pool. Me OBVIOUSLY – ‘the first’ and original zero to hero Liquid DiveMaster. Laura is here doing her rescue and this time next week she will be working towards her DM. AND FINALLY, Juilette arrived with wide eyes and calm, understated excitement. Alfred the resort’s official DiveMaster continues to be an inspiration and then there are our instructors - Gui ‘le beurre’ and then is our old friend who is wandering about in the depths of the blue surrounding Malapascua. Basically, there are LOADS of new people. Oh how could I forget, Phil and Elin are here now under the guise of Management and all round badasses. So far, they had a wonderful impact on the place LONG may it continue.

The staff have taken been given the chance to do their Open Water and so the pool has been filled with excited Filippinos and (slightly) frantic DMTs trying to stop them floating away, drinking the water out of their snorkels and generally keeping everything in control. The role of a DMT while assisting is basically to make sure everything that the instructor needs in on hand, while also looking after students and perhaps helping them through the trickier skills. Personally, I LOVE assisting on courses because you get to see people happy shock and growing awe at how easy it is to breath underwater and THEN there are the fish. EVERYWHERE. I get a properly euphoric feeling when diving with newbies because it reminds me of why I am here and invigorates me even on the slowest of days. Gui and I are becoming a better and better team which is gently solidifying a friendship for many years to come. It’s not all rainbows and butterflies. While assisting in the open water we basically end up riding the student’s tank ‘like a little pony’ (my words) to make sure they do not ascend too quickly.

Daily life is hotting up both literally (the sun is back… and this time it want revenge) and metaphorically. The life of a DiveMaster and the training that precedes it is fairly all encompassing. Of an average day, I can expect to be welcoming new guests *INSERT HOLLYWOOD WINK AND GUN*, cleaning and servicing equipment, mapping new dive sites or errrrr, DIVING. More accurately, I could be guiding, briefing procedures for, buddy-ing up with guests or assisting Gui on certifications. This week Suzi, Eva and I have been refining our skills to “demonstration quality”. What are these skills you talk of? Witchcraft? Shamanism? Baking? Nope. I am talking about displaying diving techniques. These vary greatly from clearing your mask of water, removing and replacing your weight-belt while underwater or air depletion scenarios. What is this demonstration quality malarkey and why is it necessary for a DiveMaster? Ultimately if I am assisting on a course it may be the case that need to help a student if they are having problems with a skills so demonstration quality basically means slow, grand gestures with plenty of “remember, don’t put your mask on upside down” using only hand signals. It’s like training to be an aquatic Marcel Marceau.

Fear not good people, most of the times in between these strenuous and hectic days, I am found reclining in my favourite corner of the chill out area or propping up the bar. Both important parts of my personal life training. It was with sheer delight that a good friend from my previous life in London – Gav - was out here whence I returned. He is the reason I ended up in this corner of paradise because he put me in touch with Zoe last April. April 10th to be precise. I think that day will be forever etched into my life as a turning point. Thanks Gav, it was properly wonderful to see you here even overlapped for only a few days. Gav and I worked together and shared MANY a night in the pub, so bringing him, Zoe (a childhood friend since the age of 3), me and everyone else at liquid together… on a night out… could only end in carnage. It is here that I will use a direct quotation from Gav himself:

“Well last night went like this - 4 dinners between 3, jugs of cocktails, Philippine Reggae band, 9 people on a tricycle, random club, dice based drinking game, accidental punch on the nose, French love triangle, drunken man from Lincoln, disgruntled prostitutes, fun with static electricity and a bear, 4 people sleeping in a tricycle, a torchlit walk home and a persistent ladyboy called Stephen then some excellent star gazing from a volcanic beach. Pretty average Wednesday night really”

I don’t think I need to elaborate.

I thought I would leave you with MY favourite underwater creature that I have found and fortunately for me, they are along the coast. It is a flambouyant cuttle fish. They are about 1-2 inches long. If you wave your hand near them, first they go into hover mode THEN, they go crazy displaying white and purple stripes. I am not sure if you have ever seen a cuttle fish BUT they are able to change colour to blend with their surroundings. They display these colours to confuse and put-off any predators. Have a look HERE for a video taken my John one of our former guests.

I have a listen to Michael Kiwanuka - Home Again. Don’t get me wrong, I am not homesick BUT I love my home, my friends and my family both here and in the UK. This song fills me with a warmth that could only be emulated by having all these people in one place. One beautiful place.

Take it easy people.

Until the next time, Ads

2011 - music happened during it

Turns out I’ve been away for most of this year but I still saw it as my civil duty to write about the music that made this year go with such a wonderful fizz and bubble (with the occasional bout of leishmaniasis).

When I Grow Up by First Aid Kit A band I am fairly sure that have featured before and often talk about is the Swedish folk-pop duo First Aid Kit . If you got a praaalem wid dis then you gonna have to deal with it. Their uncanny ability to create power through evocative  two part harmonies backed by simple acoustic arrangement showcases their talented pragmaticism - a sentence that does not come easily. Not only do they repeatedly create beautiful music beyond comprehension they also have an uncanny knack of covering the perfect song in a manner that induces emotions seldom seen/felt/heard. Here I would like to cite Fever Ray - When I Grow Up. This is easily one of my tracks of the year/life. My love of these two is easily replicated in the shape of Ane Brun. I don’t know a whole lot about her apart from the fact she shares her name with a friend of a friend and Humming One of Your Songs was a huge part of my year. She is worthy of far more than a sentence but time presses.

You have to remember that I have been in the third world for most of this year, usually without internet access, let alone access to my usual musical outlets. SO, I was first alerted to Beth Jeans Houghton (a name I would consider for my future offspring) after her BBC 6Music session whereupon sheperformed Dodechedron. Not only was this a wonderful moment. It was an brilliant version of an already excellent song. I had been waiting for almost two years for the single/album. I had seen her perform at Glastonbury, I had heard on the radio since; posted and re-posted about her. My only gripe (a word I really like these days) is how the beginning of Dodecahedron has a weird, scary baby crying. It freaks me and every else out EVERY time the song comes on.

It’s hard to know where to start when talking about Mastodon. Their 2011 release The Hunter is not everyone’s cup of prog-metal tea. Having been a long term fan of Tool and Maynard James Keenan, I was easily convinced when recommended Crack the Skye by an old metallier – it’s like a sermellier but for metal - friend whose opinion I value. The Hunter was another LP that was not an instant ear-pleaser BUT, I was expecting this. I gave it a few listens, usually on a boat heading to a tropical island I have been frequenting for the latter quarter of this year. A stranger juxtaposition of images, I don’t know one, an even stranger intermingling of memories, not found one yet. Together - the journey and The Hunter – they pumped me into a feverously introspective mood that I have rarely felt before and I wonder how I would replicate again in the future. Listen to this set of jagged, fiery audio ramblings and I have no doubt you will find yourself in a headspace that you are not immediately familiar with. I double-dare you no returns.

Clichéd Lifetime achievement award: System of a Down. Much as I feel I have no right to gift any band with this pointless of all pointlessnesses, I do want to find a way of mentioning System of A Down. A band who opened my eyes to heavy beyond heavy guitars with a lyricist who was at least possessed and more acurately deranged (in a good way).

Dispatch will forever hold a fond place in my heart having first heard them in the year 2011 on a veranda overlooking the province of Bario in the Kelabit Highlands of Borneo. It was at this moment, as the sun was setting and the night was warming up to be one to go down in my history, The General came on. Simply put, it was a great acoustic rock song which told an excellent story which is a rarity these days. Then I heard Out Loud while in a bar in the Philippines – my home – and I was struck dumb. Quiet. Almost acappella. Heart-wrenching content. This missive could not have gone out without a mention of this or them.

DISPATCH - The General by foundations

SBTRKT – A tenuous non-sequitor à I do not particularly like Little Dragon. I saw them headlining a small gig in Highbury a few years ago (I was there to see Stateless) and found them to be a little boring BUT definitely headlining a growing adolescent generation of music. Having said this their vocalist lends her voice box to Wildfire – the track that made me stop and re-think about this random-letter generated name’s offerings. It was an instant contender for favourite track of the year. I have no idea if this is old news. So, Aaron Jerome aka SBTRKTEIVNASDUI has manage to fuse some favourites, and so clearly the best, elements of electronic music. There is lovely fudgey, dupsteppy bass coupled with exciting futuristic blip-blop noises, various synths with simple and immersive lyrics. All in all, a strong contender for album of the year for me. If you are able to get past the name, you will massively appreciate the excitement that will fuel in your belly. As a little side thought though, I love the audacity of the just-too-long-to-be-comfortable pause in Right Thing to Do.The number of times I thought my iPod had randomly stopped...

It feels like a day/week cannot go past where I or someone near me does not wax lyrical about Adele. It is even stranger for me when people assume that 21 is the hit album. Personally, 19 is one of the best albums I own so for her follow-up to hold as strong a part in my cerebral hard disk is quite a statement de-void of ANY hyperbole. Buy it. Buy them both. Listen to them BOTH. A LOT. Interesting seguey. Jamie XX was responsible for the best remix of the year with his metamorphosis of Rolling in the Deep. I love this track but sadly it has fallen foul to its own hype and is now over played, over-covered and mentioned all too often. BUT. As I said. I like the Jamie XX mix before it was cool. Honourable mention to his remixes of Gill Scott Heron. I am a tiny bit ashamed that that was how I was introduced to the late NYC acid jazz hero.

Adele - Rolling In The Deep (Jamie xx Shuffle) by hotfortheencore

Ali BeatnikOnline Raymond. There I’ve said it. This fella and his blog are a mutual friend and my go to for all musics urban and peri-urban. It was on a very indulgent day towards the beginning of this year that I stumbled across Justin Uzomba aka. Mikill Pane. To be more accurate I stumbled across “The Return of Mister Pane... the lanky n****r with purple frames.”. The video was cool, set in various scenes throughout the Brick Lane area but it was his turn of phrase and intrinsic sneerish humour that I LOVED. Fearful that this was a one off I YouTube’d his name whereupon I discovered a collaboration with this semi-unknown – Ed Sheeran – on a track called Little Lady. THIS is my track of the year. Ed, an urban folkser or a folkish getto rudeboy succeeds in using an angelic (he is very ginger, not sure why that is relevant here) vocals over ska/dub acoustic guitars and grand sounding production to create beautiful all encompassing songs. Little Lady, which is a re-work of the Sheeran’s original The A Team, on the other hand is possibly one of the most intricate and wonderful pieces of wordsmanship. Messrs Sheeran and Pane/Uzomba play their parts with Ed providing the melancholic hook and backing tracks while Mr Pane gives the world a thought provoking, macabre and hollistically dark story delivered in a fittingly monotone narrative. It’s one of those where people renew their faith that music is amazing.

With genuine wonderful circluarity of things the very same album of collaborations that gave us Little Lady also introduced me to Devlin. At first I was slightly non-plussed then, while in the jungles of Borneo, I was listening to a friends iPod an Devlin’s Community Outcast came on. After a few listens, I realised it was the classic strings/synths coupled with standard hip-hopish beats and, in this case fast, proper London inflcition that was gripping me. He paints a picture of sadder side of the Great British community and the shortcomings that “Brown told us to live with”. Surprisingly (for me at least) it became one of my top 10 most played from 2012. Give it a go and I am sure you’ll also be pleasantly surprised.

This year has definitely and maybe obviously been the year that dubstep ‘went mainstream’. Flux Pavillion in my opinion (which this whole thing is) is the top of the class. His tracks should come with some form of health warning stating something along the lines of PEOPLE WITH HEART CONDITIONS SHOULD SEEK ADVICE BEFORE INDULGING. The best part is that his mixes are also heart murmringly good. Freestylers – Cracks (Flux Pavillion Remix) = one of the best songs to sweat to. Jamoriqui - Blue Skies (Flux Pavillion remix) = euphorically bright even on the darkest of winter days. MIA – Internest Connection (Flux Pavillion remix) = my favourite song my MIA about the internet. System malfunction à wobbly base noise. Plus. Flux Pavillion. It’s a cool name.

I feel like I shouldn’t bother writing about Tune-Yards because everyone else is. I am in no way claiming to be massively original or unique but I doubt I could say much that someone else hasn’t already said more directly. A great album that could be the younger, female cousin of Vampire Weekend. It has a similar African-ish influence or perhaps it’s a general tribal (in finger quotes) feel PLUS, the vocals provided by Merrill Garbus are excellent to sing along to especially in busy communter trains and buses. Try it. I challenge you not to have at least the seat next to you cleared within 25 seconds. The album is great, sunny and slightly unqiue but you might need to give it a chance or two. Bizness and Powa were the two tracks that hooked me.

Having been a long term fan of Dan le sac vs. Scroobius Pip, I was curious to see who this Sage Francis was. He is always listed in the same sentence as Pip and supported some legs of their recent tour. Then, out of no-where, the same friend who showed me Devlin text me – I was in Borneo and he was back home by this point – with the words The Best of Times – Sage Francis. I downloaded it. It instantly captured me. Since then, Li(f)e as been a constant. He delivers his words in the street poet, slam style with a pronoused meter and rhythm within the words themselves. As his name states, he is very wise, often insightful but always rational(ish). Little Houdini was another standout on Li(f)e which was released earlier this year. The backing to his words varies greatly so, rather than ponficate I will just urge you to try it on for yourself. Which is the complete antithesis to...

...one thing that I HAVE noticed. The current trends of sub-popluar music - wishy washy, minimal, vocal style that seems to be prevalent and start committing to the noises, sounds and music that leads our way. I am a little disappointed considering this time last year I might have been talking about Seight Bells for example. Is say let’s teabag the flimflam, smash through the mashmallowly mediocracy and prouldy squat a-top the golden retriever of empowerment safe in the knowledge that we are not ecouraging the production of recessio-pop^*.

Until next year.

^*This is possibly the greatest sentence ever written. There is no way I can follow that up. I think I can retire now.

Philippines - Papa's a-coming

2012. It’s been a funny year already but mainly in a good positive, good-foundation-on-which-to start-a-year kinda way. I left London and my family and friends at 7:30pm on the 31^st December only to wake up in Riyadh at 4:30am (I think) to the constant sound of mobile phone ringing. The sound of a phone ringing is no longer noteworthy but it seemed like the world I had woken up in was suddenly sponsored by the Nokia ringtone you know the one – diddle-dee-dee-dee-dee-DEEEE diddle-dee-dee-dee-dee-DEEEE - including  the airport tannoy.

I went home, back to London town, for Christmas and I have to admit that is was not relaxing but nor was I expecting or intending it to be. It was a maelstrom of social jitterbug of flitting and shimmying making sure I spent time with the people I wanted to while also crowbarring in those who make my life the wonderous joy that it is. I feel/felt the need to state my love for London and the UK because I do often as a retort to a remark like “I don’t blame you for leaving this hellhole”. I am proud to be English and swell with pride while wondering the street of my London town.

I have been ‘working hard’ (I add the inverted commas because I can imagine Dad laughing at the fact that I am calling it 1) working and 2) hard) while I was home and I am now a product/user tester for a few outdoorsy products. At the risk of sounding like I am kissing arse (ass for our American cousins) a bit, I have to say I am extremely impressed with what I have been given.

·         DD hammocks have given me a new sleeping system to test and so far I am very pleased to say that their new Travel Hammock/Biviis excellent. I cannot wait to go out Mount Talinis now.

·         Pelican cases have also given me an iPod case which is crush proof, watertight (but not submersible) and extremely light considering what it is able to do

·         Paramo have provide me with a pair of their Men's Maui Cotton+ Cargo Trousers. Anyone that has been following me for a little while will know that my jungle trousers from last year got obliterated so I set a few companies the challenge of providing me a decent pair and Paramo were the only ones to step up. Not only that but their use a very ethical supply chain (kind of like fair trade but for trousers) that starts in Bogota, Colombia. All else aside, these are a wonderfully well made and very light weight pair of cotton/polyester blend trousers. I already highly recommend them.

I am really quite unfashionably excited for my near and far futures. I know that any time spend at Liquid will be treasured for the rest of my life. There is a 99% chance that I am going to spend the second half of this year in Madagascar with an organisation called Frontier which would be a boyhood dream come true so you’ll have to keep an eye out for that.

It took me over 57hours to get from Heathrow to Dumaguete. I can hear everyone questions as to WHY OH WHY it takes me that long BUT I took a long way round and it was fairly cheap too. Manila NAIA Airport Terminate 3, an airport terminal I know intimately down to where the only power socket situated next to a chair is and the wireless password to three of the closed networks, was kind to me as usual. This time, I invested my time wisely by watching two parts of the Lords of the Rings trilogy (extended versions OBVIOUSLY) as well as a fair few episodes of The Wire. “Omar’s comin’ y’all”. I am tired but so happily excited to be getting back to the country/island/town/resort I call my home away from home. What should I do first when I return. Eat? Sleep? Dive? LIVE?!? Probably all of the above plus maybe a drink or two. I also need a hair cut but I think that that can wait. I am keen to meet Eva who is a new DiveMaster Trainee as well as all the many others imminently arriving over the coming weeks. (Gui has been busy).

I have bought a sack (disguised as an ASDA back for life) of treats for my co-habitants which got me thinking. What would I miss from the UK that I can’t easily get in Negros? I can access Ribena here which is something that makes me feel at home when I am away from the UK, I do not miss chocolate so much. Cooking-wise, Ricki and Peddi are able to turn their hand to anything so, my favourite at home which is chicken in breadcrumbs is available then necessary and then it dawned on me. I definitely miss my cat Li’l (short for little... because she is little). I also think I miss Hungarian Salami - something I was bought up on. I am not the most Magyar-ish of the Magyars although there are definitely Detre/Frankl traits that are beginning to shine through – mainly blagging and charming. This was bought to my attention when explaining my favourite Jedi mind trick to my extended family which goes along something like this. If I am faced with a situation which is likely to put a spanner in my works then I explain, regardless of my experience of the situation, that “It’s fine, it’ll be ok”. This is most useful when dealing with airports, aeroplanes or the staff that man these entities. I have not paid excess baggage since I first arrived in Asia and apparently I am able to use the staff facilities in both Saudi Arabian and Filippino airports mainly because “it’ll be ok.”

I have to admit that this entry of my life feels a lot like the gentle mental meanderings of a sleep deprived diving junglist without any mention of diving or jungling. I admit also that were it not for the sleep deprivation, the mental meanderings would probably be slightly more erratic. If you have a problem with that then you should probably have stopped reading a while ago. I ALSO think the jungle can be made into a verb. One CAN jungle.

Wild Child – Pillow Talk; Daughter – Candles and SBTRKT –Right Thing to Do were the main songs that highlighted and sountracked my sojourn back to the UK. I heartily encourage you to give them all a listen.

I could have summed this 1,092 words up in a couple of sentences:

Friends, family and London - I love you and I’ll see you again soonish. Liquid, my family there and Dauin – I love you too and Papa’s home!